Question about denominations that require certain types of dress...

[Proudmommy]

I was thinking about it and I don't understand why if the God we serve is so colorful and creative that some people think that we all have to dress alike and wear dreary frumpy looking clothes. I understand that we shouldn't dress to impress or bring attention to ourselves, but isn't there a compromise where people can dress nicely in clothes that don't look like everyone else?? I mean if God dress the animals and flowers in beautiful things, why should we walk around looking...well...'blah'?

[andy]

The following is my opinion only: it is all about control. I am not speaking of modest dress, all of us both male and female should dress modestly.

What I am speaking of are the useless rules and regulations certain denominations demand. I really shouldn't use the term denominations, they are actually cults.

Our guide is scripture and the leading of the Holy Spirit.

We have freedom in Jesus, not bondage.

jmho

[cathy1953]

The religions that dress in a certain way or wear their hair a certain way.....if they think they are dressing so as not to bring attention to themselves, they really ARE bringing attention to themselves.
I won't bring out certain names of denominations, but you know who they are.

It DOES put them in the spotlight, so to speak.

I think people can dress nicely and modestly at the same time. I also don't believe in dressing the hilt either.....you know....to show that one has money.
I know of a church here in my town where a person did not feel welcome in this particular church because some of the men, including the pastor, always wore suits and a tie to church. This particular person apparently could not afford to buy suits. The pastor opted to stop wearing his suits so that this person would feel more welcome, and know that if he couldn't afford to buy suits to wear to church then that was okay, and also so that he wouldn't be the only one coming to church without a suit on.

I thought that was commendable of that pastor. He probably has alot of suits hanging in his closet that he might not get to wear now, because he's not wearing them to church anymore.

He just dresses casually now. A nice polo shirt, and casual pants.

[831]

Hi All.

The only real rules we have in scripture about dress when in church or chapel or any other kind of place one goes to praise the Lord.

The only rule is that women should have there heads covered.

1 Corinthians 11:3-16 addresses the issue of women and head coverings. The context of the entire passage of 1 Corinthians 11:3-16 is submission to the God-given order and "chain of command." A "covering" on a woman's head is used as an illustration of the order, headship, and the authority of God. The key verse of this passage is 1 Corinthians 11:3 "But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God." The implications of this verse are found in the rest of the passage. The order is: God the Father, God the Son, the man or husband, and the woman or wife. The veil or covering on the head of a believing Corinthian wife showed that she was under the authority of her husband, and therefore under submission to God.

Within the context of this passage is this verse, "For this cause ought the woman to have power on her head because of the angels." The word "power" in this verse in the Greek means "jurisdiction" or "authority," and the covering is a sign that a wife is under the authority of her husband. Why is that important to angels? The relationship of God with men is something that angels watch and learn from (1 Peter 1:12). Therefore, a woman's submission to God's delegated "power" over her is an illustration to angels. The holy angels, who are in perfect and total submission to God, expect that we, as followers of Christ, do the same.

This covering not only means a cloth but also can refer to a woman's hair length. How can we say that? We must take this verse in the context or the setting in which it is presented. "Doth not even nature itself teach you, that, if a man have long hair, it is a shame unto him? But if a woman have long hair, it is a glory to her: for her hair is given her for a covering" (1 Corinthians 11:14-15). Therefore, in the context of this passage, a woman who is wearing her hair longer marks herself out distinctively as a woman and not a man. The Apostle Paul is saying here that in the Corinthian culture, when a wife's hair was longer than her husband's, it showed her submission to his headship. The roles of the male and female are designed by God to portray a profound spiritual lesson, that is of submission to the will and the order of God.

But, why is hair an issue in this passage? The Apostle Paul is addressing something in the Corinthian culture that was being allowed to disrupt the church. Women in service in the pagan temples had their heads shaved. It marked them as pagan temple prostitutes. The Apostle Paul says in this passage that a woman who is shorn or shaved should be covered (1 Corinthians 11:6), for woman shorn or shaved of her hair had lost her "glory," and she was not under the protection of a husband. A shorn head with out a covering was equivalent to saying, "I refuse to submit to God's order." Therefore, the Apostle Paul is teaching the Corinthians that hair length or the wearing of a "covering" by the woman was an outward indication of a heart attitude of submission to God and to His established authority. This was important for the Corinthian church was to be separate from the established culture of Corinth (2 Corinthians 6:17).

God's order is that the husband is the head of the wife as God is the head of Christ - and there is no in equality here or inferiority. God and Christ are one and the same, and the husband and the wife are one. This is not a passage that teaches that the woman is inferior to man or that she should be submissive to every man. It is teaching God's order and spiritual headship in the marriage relationship. In the Corinthian culture, a woman who covered her head during worship or when she was in public displayed her submission to authority.

In today's culture, we no longer view a woman's wearing of a head covering as a sign of submission. In most modern societies, scarves and hats are fashion accessories. A woman has the choice to wear a head covering if she views it as a sign of her submission to the authority of her husband. However, it is a personal choice and not something that should be used to judge spirituality. The real issue here is the heart attitude of obedience to God's authority and submission to His established order as "unto the LORD." God is far more concerned with an attitude of submission, than an outward display of submission via a head covering. 1 Timothy 2:9-10, "I also want women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God."

This is it, there is no other rules in the word of God about how we should dress in this situation. So all these so called rules you talk about are rules of men & not of God. I do hope that this clears up any questions you had about this subject.

God Bless you all
831

[Proudmommy]

I believe that these rules are rules of men and not God, but I just don't understand where they are getting them. I always feel sorry for the women that I see in these denominations. They look like they are headed to a funeral or something. It seems a shame to me that if they are christians that they should walk around looking like that.

[Ajani]

We have Old Order Mennonites in an area just over an hour away and I don't feel sorry for them at all. They are quite happy people, and very content to wear their muted floral dresses and plain clothes. They don't believe that what we wear matters, and since they believe that they are to be separate from the rest of the world in many ways, why should they wear anything other than what they do?

It's a little like the philosophy behind school uniforms. Students don't have to focus on what others think of what they're wearing (assuming the dress code is strict, which it isn't, but I'm talking about perfect world scenario). It frees them to just be themselves without the whole social stigma of clothing.

[Proudmommy]

The ones that I see, it isn't just the clothing that makes them look that way. The ones I've seen all seem to walk around with frowns and look dour. They don't look happy or content with how they are required to dress.

[Mommy2KandM]

This doesn't just happen in denominations the majority of us aren't members of. We have a baptist Church just down the street that requires women to wear dresses. If you come the first week in pants you are spoken to and told to only come in a dress or skirt from this point on. :twitch

What really breaks my heart about it, is that people searching are so wounded by something like this. So they don't go back and they often lose the desire to try anywhere else after the experience.

[Proudmommy]

This doesn't just happen in denominations the majority of us aren't members of. We have a baptist Church just down the street that requires women to wear dresses. If you come the first week in pants you are spoken to and told to only come in a dress or skirt from this point on. :twitch

What really breaks my heart about it, is that people searching are so wounded by something like this. So they don't go back and they often lose the desire to try anywhere else after the experience.

:(: That is sad. My pastor's wife believes that she should wear dresses and that all women should wear them, but she keeps it to herself and let's God work on those of that don't. Which is the way it should be. If God doesn't want me wearing pants, then He'll deal with me and make it clear.

[Mommy2KandM]

:(: That is sad. My pastor's wife believes that she should wear dresses and that all women should wear them, but she keeps it to herself and let's God work on those of that don't. Which is the way it should be. If God doesn't want me wearing pants, then He'll deal with me and make it clear.


exactly! :nod we waste so much time trying to be the Holy Spirit for people. :(: As if we would ever be qualified for such a job.

[deafnc77]

i have always felt muslims and some amish community is a blah.

I always liked how india wear their clothes. Very colorful!

But don't worry about those who prefer to wear dresses. If it bother them that much, they would quit their church and go somewhere else. This is something they decide to do and of course, they feel more comfortable fellowshipping those who understand them. And yes, some will tell these people to wear dresses for modesty sakes for the men and their children. They feel that there is too many people having sex before marriage so they trying their best keep the men and children from stumbling. at least thats how it was at my old church. my new church does not bring up clothing issue.

[ginnae]

This doesn't just happen in denominations the majority of us aren't members of. We have a baptist Church just down the street that requires women to wear dresses. If you come the first week in pants you are spoken to and told to only come in a dress or skirt from this point on. :twitch

What really breaks my heart about it, is that people searching are so wounded by something like this. So they don't go back and they often lose the desire to try anywhere else after the experience.

I sent my kids to a vbs at a baptist church the other week because I was somewhat interested in attending and wanted to scope things out first from a causal point.

Everything was looking good and much different from my old church. I was about ready to give this church a try until I noticed that every female working as a teacher was wearing a skirt. THis was everyday, not a just happened as a one time deal.

Because I observed that, it has put me on hold about wanting to attend that church. I have nothing against skirts or dresses, but it should not be a rule for women. Women can look just as much a woman in pants as she can a skirt.

I have seen some of these women outside of church and they don't wear skirts, so it must just be an in church thing.

I will not attend a church that limits me to skirts or dresses. I have a really hard time finding any that fit me well so I prefer to stick to pants.

[Proudmommy]

It's not really the wearing dresses that has me wondering, but the way they are made I guess. They look so 'blah'. I am jsut wondering why these denominations think it is wrong for women to look nice or pretty. I understand that it isn't what is on the outside that matters, but why if God made all this beauty to enjoy, is it wrong for women to look nice?

[BHiles]

I sent my kids to a vbs at a baptist church the other week because I was somewhat interested in attending and wanted to scope things out first from a causal point.

Everything was looking good and much different from my old church. I was about ready to give this church a try until I noticed that every female working as a teacher was wearing a skirt. THis was everyday, not a just happened as a one time deal.

Because I observed that, it has put me on hold about wanting to attend that church. I have nothing against skirts or dresses, but it should not be a rule for women. Women can look just as much a woman in pants as she can a skirt.

I have seen some of these women outside of church and they don't wear skirts, so it must just be an in church thing.

I will not attend a church that limits me to skirts or dresses. I have a really hard time finding any that fit me well so I prefer to stick to pants.

Most churches who teach women should wear modest clothing that includes modest length dresses and skirts do not have any such "rules" for attending church. Everyone is welcome regardless.

However, most do have a certain style of dress that they wish for anyone who will represent them in a formal way. If you worked at McDonalds they have a certain style of uniform that they wish for you to wear. At most Independant Fundamental Baptist Churches they also have a certain style of dress for those who represent them. There is nothing wrong witht that.

[deafnc77]

It's not really the wearing dresses that has me wondering, but the way they are made I guess. They look so 'blah'. I am jsut wondering why these denominations think it is wrong for women to look nice or pretty. I understand that it isn't what is on the outside that matters, but why if God made all this beauty to enjoy, is it wrong for women to look nice?


can you show me an example? because most women I know who dresses modestly feel beautiful and ladylike. Like the women in 1800's having a teaparty that you see in pictures? Pro 31:10 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.

[Proudmommy]

I can't show you an example. All the ones I am finding on line are actually very pretty. The ones I people I have seen and am talking about now were wearing are all black or gray, and drab looking. I'm not trying to say they are wrong or they are ugly, I am just wondering why it seems they are against looking more 'colorful', I guess.

[ginnae]

Most churches who teach women should wear modest clothing that includes modest length dresses and skirts do not have any such "rules" for attending church. Everyone is welcome regardless.

However, most do have a certain style of dress that they wish for anyone who will represent them in a formal way. If you worked at McDonalds they have a certain style of uniform that they wish for you to wear. At most Independant Fundamental Baptist Churches they also have a certain style of dress for those who represent them. There is nothing wrong witht that.
Ok, I understand that, I guess I am quite jitterish about finding a new church home. Thank you for putting it in another perspective for me.

[prairiedog]

The worst I've ever seen in church were women wearing their fur coats/stoles & smugly looked about to see if anyone noticed.

[Ajani]

I think that grey and black can be very pretty, and that the plainest outfits are sometimes the nicest. What you think of as 'blah' and take pity on them for, they may very well find quite lovely, and may further find your wardrobe to be garish and tacky (note, I've never laid eyes on you in real life). It's all perspective.

[deafnc77]

My aunt and her daughter have a closet full of black pants and some black dresses. They will not wear any other color . They told me that they think black help them look slim and that Black doesn't draw attention to their hip/bottom area as other colors do.


Another word, they think they are fat and trying to hide it by wearing black pants. maybe that the same reason some people wear black skirts.

[Proudmommy]

The worst I've ever seen in church were women wearing their fur coats/stoles & smugly looked about to see if anyone noticed.

:rolleyes That is tacky.:nod

[Proudmommy]

I think that grey and black can be very pretty, and that the plainest outfits are sometimes the nicest. What you think of as 'blah' and take pity on them for, they may very well find quite lovely, and may further find your wardrobe to be garish and tacky (note, I've never laid eyes on you in real life). It's all perspective.

Yes, they can be. I agree. But I am wondering about the denominations that require all women to wear just those colors. I'm not saying that a woman that choses to wear those in her walk is wrong, but why must all women in a certain denom. wear the same thing, why do the leaders of those denoms think that all women must dress alike?

[deafnc77]

I never heard such thing..unless they are german baptist (they are anabaptist (http://www.anabaptists.org/), and similiar to Amish), amish, or muslim.

[Ajani]

I think that some faiths dictate what women wear in an attempt to keep men from sinning. Now a lustful man will get his kicks where he can, but a woman in a dowdy frock is deemed to be less of a temptation (I believe that's part of the thinking behind the Islamic dress code).

[poetess]

I have never understood how some people get the idea that it is biblical for a woman to wear a dress, and men to wear pants. In biblical days, everyone wore robes. Many times dresses are much less modest than pants are. I dont wear dresses anymore because they are uncomfortable. My mother in law had been out of the church for many years, but finally went to one...and they chased her away by demanding she wear a dress....she hadnt worn one for years (not even to my wedding..she wore black pants!) because surgery to her knees left her feeling very self conscience. She finally started going to church with us....where noone cared what she wore.

[bopeep1909]

It sounds like they are legalistic. We are not to live by the Old Testament legalism. We have Jesus.<><

[Resting In Him]

This doesn't just happen in denominations the majority of us aren't members of. We have a baptist Church just down the street that requires women to wear dresses. If you come the first week in pants you are spoken to and told to only come in a dress or skirt from this point on. :twitch

What really breaks my heart about it, is that people searching are so wounded by something like this. So they don't go back and they often lose the desire to try anywhere else after the experience.

I wouldn't be caught dead wearing.......................a DRESS!:lol

Seriously, with my figure I look so frumpy wearing a dress so I wear slacks. If I'm guilty of anything it's vanity. :D:

Sorry if that offends anyone, but it's my personal choice.

So far, God hasn't pointed His finger at me and I'm comfortable with Him about it.

[BHiles]

I have never understood how some people get the idea that it is biblical for a woman to wear a dress, and men to wear pants. In biblical days, everyone wore robes.


well.... not exactly. When men would work or go to battle they would do something called "girding up their loins". They would take a belt/sash from their waste and wrap it thought their legs and arond their waist. It essentially took their robe and turned it into more of a pant for agility of movement. It would also allow their "form" to be shown. Deuteronomy was specifically speaking of this when it declared an abomination to God if a woman were to wear this item that pertaineth to a man.

That is as far as I will take this.

[Resting In Him]

well.... not exactly. When men would work or go to battle they would do something called "girding up their loins". They would take a belt/sash from their waste and wrap it thought their legs and arond their waist. It essentially took their robe and turned it into more of a pant for agility of movement. It would also allow their "form" to be shown. Deuteronomy was specifically speaking of this when it declared an abomination to God if a woman were to wear this item that pertaineth to a man.

That is as far as I will take this.

So, men can show their "form" but women can't? :D:

Just kidding!:):

[deafnc77]

I have never understood how some people get the idea that it is biblical for a woman to wear a dress, and men to wear pants. In biblical days, everyone wore robes. Many times dresses are much less modest than pants are. I dont wear dresses anymore because they are uncomfortable. My mother in law had been out of the church for many years, but finally went to one...and they chased her away by demanding she wear a dress....she hadnt worn one for years (not even to my wedding..she wore black pants!) because surgery to her knees left her feeling very self conscience. She finally started going to church with us....where noone cared what she wore.


there is one lady who wore pants every sunday at our church . But she wore that was more of a looser type/ dressy type of pant. It looks really nice and ladylike too. She has to wear pants cause she have trouble walking, sitting down, and standing. It was easier for her to slip on a pant, than a skirt because you have to wear pantyhose with a skirt. Also she has to position herself a weird way to help herself up, it would look immodest with a skirt. Now if men would just help her stand up and sit down, it would be no problem, but people forget to help elderly.

[Violin Girl]

I went to a church growing up that was over the top very, very legalistic with just about everything especially when it came to the girls and women of the church. If someone came into the church with pants on they were given dirty looks. I use to have nightmares about going to church and school in pants accidently. I was once "turned in" wearing my Captain D's uniform which included pants that my parents approved while I was in high school. Out of high school if someone from the church saw you at a mall or eating out in pants, they would not even talk to you. That's craaazzzzy.

I vowed never to make my daughter go through that, so she has grown up attending Baptists churches that wasn't like that. I disagree with wearing disrespectul clothing, but not nice women's pantsuits to church.

I truly believe that God meant for us not to try to look like men or men to try to dress like women. I wear women's clothing not men's clothing. I don't think it has a bloomin' thing to do with wearing pants. I'm not trying to look like a man! Now if you are out to try to dress like a man, then ya I think you have some problems you need to deal with.

My .o2 about the whole thing.

[Buggaboo]

I think what it comes down to is you should just dress nice for church, but nothing revealing or flashy. Your there for God not for everyone else. I don't think that a woman should have to wear a dress every time that she goes to church. I have worn both dresses and pants and have felt comfotable in both.

[toddlemom]

I was thinking about it and I don't understand why if the God we serve is so colorful and creative that some people think that we all have to dress alike and wear dreary frumpy looking clothes. I understand that we shouldn't dress to impress or bring attention to ourselves, but isn't there a compromise where people can dress nicely in clothes that don't look like everyone else?? I mean if God dress the animals and flowers in beautiful things, why should we walk around looking...well...'blah'?


Our Mennonite neighbors don't look frumpy unless they've been milking the cows or butchering chickens in that particular dress.

I think they are living out the idea of "being in the world, but not of it" as best they can.

Having been to the county fair this week, the real frumps were us English trying to stay physically cool and letting it all (too much of it) hang out :fear The Mennonite ladies in dresses and prayer coverings still looked modest and presentable.

The AMish and Mennonites around here like pretty fabrics and the children and teens often wear pretty pastel solids (Amish) and prints (Mennonite)

I'm ready to duck and cover here -- I think modest dress honors the Lord more than trying to be fashionable. In my opinion fashions right now are pretty scary.

YSIC
Ann

[Proudmommy]

They are scary aren't they??:fear I'm sorry but over weight or over the hill women don't need to be wearing clothes that teenageres wear...teenagers shouldn't even be wearing most of those styles either.

And again, it isn't that I have problem with women wearing these dresses or think they are wrong. I've jsut wondered about the ones that I have seen wearing all black or brown, and why it is such an absolute 'doctrine' to go to 'their' church. Like one of the ladies' here was talking about not being allowed in the church because she wore pants. I mean do they honestly think that God would approve of them judging a person because of the outside, when the Bible states that it is the heart that God looks at?

[alrdyreg]

im more of a white color, black tie black slacks kinda guy. and i love my bicycle. :freaked












j/k

[Proudmommy]

im more of a white color, black tie black slacks kinda guy. and i love my bicycle. :freaked

j/k
:pound :pound :pound :pound

[Betty Lou]

I weat pant suits to Church. I have a pink set, a green set, a brown set, and a blue set. I have two dreses but both yellow for some reason. I ususally wear pants because I walk with a cane. I am blessed that my husband helps me stand up when we stand at Church. I almost fell a couple of weeks ago because I was having issues with my hip, but my hubby the gentleman that he is, kept me from falling. My daugther goes to Church that believes in wearing only dresses and never cut your hair. I must say though that every Christmas when I go to Church with her that no one has ever been ugly to be for wearing pants or having short hair. I asked my daughter if she was offended by me wearing pants to her Church and she said no. She knows how hard wearing panty hose is on me.
betty

[FollowTheLamb]

I came out of a church where women wore dresses to the meetings and men wore suits to the Sunday meetings. Here are some random observations.

1. The women thought they were doing the right thing when dressing modestly. I now attend a church where people dress casually and believe me, the girls are not dressing modestly. Girls today don't seem to get the concept.

2. No one told me to wear a suit. I resisted it. But the Lord won over all my resistence so that I could wear a suit in meekness and not pride myself about not giving in or being different from everyone else.

3. We were taught that we were not going to the movies, but to the Lord. We would dress up for a wedding, so we do know what a special occasion was, and how to dress appropriately fof it. Are not our Sunday morning times with the Lord special occasions? By dressing up, we are showing a wayward world that church is special.

4. It wasn't all just dresses and suits. We were active in the Bible studies and outreaches. We had substance to our faith. Don't link dresses with a shallow spiritually. Believe me, the women's minds were very sharp; they knew their Bibles and how to share the Gospel and act in self-sacrifical love for others.

5. Every place where men and women gather for a time will exert peer pressure. When every woman wears a dress in that locale, it will exert pressure on those who don't, even when no words are spoken. Each woman will have to deal with that on her own terms. What does she have to prove by resisting dressing modestly for the sake of the males?

6. When you find a terrific Bible church, don't worry about the dress code. Read enough letters here and you'll find plenty of people who no longer go to churches because they can't find one good enough for them. So the church people wear dresses! So what?! Why should that stop you? If they are doing an honorable work with the VBS, why would you not want to be associated with it? You would gladly wear a beer casket if you knew the work will be handsomely rewarded by the Lord!

This is not to say that I believe all women should wear dresses. However, think about this: girls need role models of modestly dress women who are also god-fearing and full of the Spirit, and full of helpful good works. Where are these girls going to find women like that? on TV?

[ginnae]

This is not to say that I believe all women should wear dresses. However, think about this: girls need role models of modestly dress women who are also god-fearing and full of the Spirit, and full of helpful good works. Where are these girls going to find women like that? on TV?
One of the reasons I was worried about the dresses at vbs was I was concerned for legalism. I have seen some baptists churches that were quite legalistic. But as someone pointed out it could be like a work uniform. Now that way of thinking I am ok with.

What I don't understand is why do people think dresses are MORE suitable than pants? I am all for dressing up for the occassion. I don't like going to church very casual, but I also think I can look put together and modest in pants. You relate it as going to a wedding. I probably would wear pants to a wedding. Actually the last two weddings I attended, I did wear pants. Did I look any less modest or any less dressed up. No I don't think so.

Another reason for me is the cost of things. Right now I only own one skirt and no dress pants, so I would have to buy more outfits. But when I attended my prior church. I owned a dress pant and a black jean. I wore those every Sunday. When I only wear those clothes on Sunday, I don't spend a lot of money for dressy clothes for me, when I have 4 kids to outfit in clothes they could wear anytime. My boys don't wear dress pants to church, just nice shirts.

I just don't think I would feel too comfortable at a church where guys all wore ties (dh doesn't even own one anymore, so that would be more cost) and women wore dresses. A mixture of nicely dressed people in dresses or pants or men in nice pants and a shirt is more ideal for all.

[deafnc77]

dressing modestly, or dresses, isn't legalistic. I rarely run into and IFB who believe you have to dress nicely to church to be saved. If you choose not to lie, steal, murder, adultery, does it make you legalistic?

IFB women wear skirts out of respect to the Lord and to be submissive, to be role models for their children, and to keep men from stumbling into lust when they should be focusing God's Words at church. All this is done AFTER they were saved.

There was an article I found that was about how you look from the distance. : If you wore a dress, everyone immediately assume you are a girl (If a dressed is no big deal, then is it a big deal when cross-dressing men wear it to church?), but if you wore pants, men have no choice but scan your body to see if you are a female or male. This is another reason why women wear dresses or skirt to church, to look like a woman. Culottes and dressy pants are ok to wear to church.



Now I know some religion like Anabaptists (I could be wrong, but this is what one anabaptist told me) believe in OSnAS (once saved, not always saved) So they believe if you sin, you have lost your salvation. and some of them are pretty strict what they wear. Most IFB do not believe this. They believe in OSAS.

[Proudmommy]

I think the legalism comes in when the deacon's of the church insist that to go to 'their' church you have to wear a certain clothes or only a certain type of dressing is 'modest'. When in fact God doesn't look at what we wear when we go to church, He looks at our heart. My pastor's wife was saved and really wanted to look nice at church, but the only 'nice' thing she had was go-go dresses. She wore those a couple of times and God helped her find more suitable clothes for free when she couldn't afford to buy them. Fortunately, she wasn't chased out of her church by the 'conform to our standards or your not welcome here' crowd.

My brother even ran into this kind of legalism when he was in high school. He dressed up nicely in a neatly pressed shirt and pants. He got to church and snagged the shirt sleeve on his truck door. He didn't have a spare shirt or have time to get back home to change, so he went in. The youth pastor took him aside and told him unless he could take the time to dress 'nicely' for church he shouldn't bother coming back.:tsk That smacks of legalism that God wouldn't approve of I believe.

[ginnae]

Ok...
I am not trying to be stubborn or anything, I am trying to understand why dresses. I never attended a church where that many ladies wore dresses, so this is all new to me.

Anyway, you state women wear dresses so men don't lust. HUH??? :confused Modesty does not equal dresses in my book. Dresses tend to fit the body just as much as a shirt and pant does. Plus dresses unless worn ankle length exposes the leg, which a lot of men find attractive even if it is just the calf.

Then you state that in dresses from a distance men can tell if a woman is a women without scanning. I don't understand this either. I can pretty much tell who is male or female from a distance no matter what they wear. Unless it is a guy with really long hear or a female that is really butch looking.

I guess I will never understand the reasoning of "Dresses = Modesty" thing.

I would think it shouldn't matter what you wear as long as it is modest.



dressing modestly, or dresses, isn't legalistic. I rarely run into and IFB who believe you have to dress nicely to church to be saved. If you choose not to lie, steal, murder, adultery, does it make you legalistic?

IFB women wear skirts out of respect to the Lord and to be submissive, to be role models for their children, and to keep men from stumbling into lust when they should be focusing God's Words at church. All this is done AFTER they were saved.

There was an article I found that was about how you look from the distance. : If you wore a dress, everyone immediately assume you are a girl (If a dressed is no big deal, then is it a big deal when cross-dressing men wear it to church?), but if you wore pants, men have no choice but scan your body to see if you are a female or male. This is another reason why women wear dresses or skirt to church, to look like a woman. Culottes and dressy pants are ok to wear to church.



Now I know some religion like Anabaptists (I could be wrong, but this is what one anabaptist told me) believe in OSnAS (once saved, not always saved) So they believe if you sin, you have lost your salvation. and some of them are pretty strict what they wear. Most IFB do not believe this. They believe in OSAS.

[ginnae]

I think the legalism comes in when the deacon's of the church insist that to go to 'their' church you have to wear a certain clothes or only a certain type of dressing is 'modest'. When in fact God doesn't look at what we wear when we go to church, He looks at our heart. .

Yes, this is what I am more worried about concerning legalism in the dress code.

[biblemommy]

I would be willing to bet the farm that what Jesus and His disiples wore would be considered a no entry wardrobe to a vast majority of the bible belt states. My folks made me wear dresses every sunday because as my father says Its showing respect to The Lord by dressing nicely...but even my mom wore pant suits during the week, and actually she wears them to church now too...dad got over it..
The last time I wore a dress was my wedding and that was in 93'..I love some of the little girl dresses they have out now...
but my fashion police of a sister says 'If you were old enough to wear it the first time...you shouldn't wear it this time!"
I laugh cuz if I still had the figure I had in the 80s I WOULD wear atleast some of what I wore then...no dresses though...
this whole dress code thing is what appealed to me about the Clavary Chapel's...Come just as you are..Chuck Smith started with a bible study beach side for the surfers who were being shamed out of churches for the lack of dress edicate!!! thanks The Lord Chuck did that, cuz CC has been a blessing to me and many many people I know...

[Mommy2KandM]

My grandfather always used the "dressing up because you're going to the Lord's house and you would dress up for any special event" idea when I was growing up.
I never ever could understand that. Unless you think God resides in a building only, and that the actual building itself is the biblical church I don't get it. God is with us always. I am no more with Him in a church building than when I am sitting in my Pj's at breakfast. I don't just see him once a week.

If someone likes and chooses to wear a dress that is fine with me. But it is not for me. I don't even own a dress to wear. I have one skirt, and it is a long jean one. :laugh We wear our everyday clothes to church. That is who we are. :):

Modest should be our dress every day. But Modest doesn't have to mean a dress.

[deafnc77]

I think the legalism comes in when the deacon's of the church insist that to go to 'their' church you have to wear a certain clothes or only a certain type of dressing is 'modest'. When in fact God doesn't look at what we wear when we go to church, He looks at our heart. My pastor's wife was saved and really wanted to look nice at church, but the only 'nice' thing she had was go-go dresses. She wore those a couple of times and God helped her find more suitable clothes for free when she couldn't afford to buy them. Fortunately, she wasn't chased out of her church by the 'conform to our standards or your not welcome here' crowd.

My brother even ran into this kind of legalism when he was in high school. He dressed up nicely in a neatly pressed shirt and pants. He got to church and snagged the shirt sleeve on his truck door. He didn't have a spare shirt or have time to get back home to change, so he went in. The youth pastor took him aside and told him unless he could take the time to dress 'nicely' for church he shouldn't bother coming back.:tsk That smacks of legalism that God wouldn't approve of I believe.


yeah, thats what happened to one of my church. They told my unsaved friend to either wear their spare culotte or she can't come to our activity. We never went back after that. But I understand why they do what they do, and it is never for salvation purpose as they believe salvation is for everyone. If it a bad church, you will know it if someone spoke to you about your choice of clothing on your first visit...or if you always wore nice clothes and had one bad day.

as far as modesty, I am only pointing out what some churches believe so you can prepare yourself when you do church searching. And yes, those who believe men can lust do wear long skirts. But don't be harsh on them, they mean well and trying to be submissive to the Lord. They believe putting their old lifestyle behind, and their new life with Christ. they also teach or discipline or however you word it with their fellow christian brothers and sisters. But They still preach the gospel, and believe salvation is for all. Believe it or not, these type of church that tell people what to wear actually does door to door soul-winning. I used to go with them every week.If they make a fuss about your clothing, feel blessed and leave if you disagree because if you stayed behind, you wouldn't be fellowshipping , you would be debating.


BTW, Each church is different. This doesn't apply to all IFB. I have attended plenty of IFB who allow women to wear pants (and it is not dressy type of pant either). you have IFB and you have IFB extremist.

[deafnc77]

My grandfather always used the "dressing up because you're going to the Lord's house and you would dress up for any special event" idea when I was growing up.
I never ever could understand that. Unless you think God resides in a building only, and that the actual building itself is the biblical church I don't get it. God is with us always. I am no more with Him in a church building than when I am sitting in my Pj's at breakfast. I don't just see him once a week.

If someone likes and chooses to wear a dress that is fine with me. But it is not for me. I don't even own a dress to wear. I have one skirt, and it is a long jean one. :laugh We wear our everyday clothes to church. That is who we are. :):

Modest should be our dress every day. But Modest doesn't have to mean a dress.


What your grandfather is trying to say is that a church is where The Lord's children fellowship together, pray together,sing together, and learn together. It is like having a biblical feast every Sunday. Kinda like your parents being excited to hear ALL their children coming to their christmas dinner. Your mom might ask everyone to dress nicely so she could take a picture of this wonderful and proud moment. Or you will volunteer to dress nice because you know your mom will be taking pictures. Well, the Lord is taking a picture of us :)

Yes, The Lord will always with you, but when he see his children together, it is call for a celebration.

[Mommy2KandM]

What your grandfather is trying to say is that a church is where The Lord's children fellowship together, pray together,sing together, and learn together. It is like having a biblical feast every Sunday. Kinda like your parents being excited to hear ALL their children coming to their christmas dinner. Your mom might ask everyone to dress nicely so she could take a picture of this wonderful and proud moment. Or you will volunteer to dress nice because you know your mom will be taking pictures. Well, the Lord is taking a picture of us :)

Yes, The Lord will always with you, but when he see his children together, it is call for a celebration.



See but I don't buy that. The Lord isn't taking a picture of us there at the building. In fact I think He cares much much much more about how we are 24/6 over how we are on the 7th day. The Lord isn't impressed with fancy dress. :noidea Anyone can play a part one day a week, and I think it is easy to fall into when you act and look different on Sunday than you do the rest of the week.
Like I said before.. if you feel authentic in a dress.. great, wear it. I feel unlike myself and uncomfortable in a dress but authentic in my jeans or carpi pants. :laugh

[BHiles]

See but I don't buy that. The Lord isn't taking a picture of us there at the building. In fact I think He cares much much much more about how we are 24/6 over how we are on the 7th day. The Lord isn't impressed with fancy dress. :noidea Anyone can play a part one day a week, and I think it is easy to fall into when you act and look different on Sunday than you do the rest of the week.
Like I said before.. if you feel authentic in a dress.. great, wear it. I feel unlike myself and uncomfortable in a dress but authentic in my jeans or carpi pants. :laugh
He did care enough that one of His very first acts was to change the way man dressed. After the first sin he did not allow Adam and Eve to dress any old way they pleased but made clothes for them Himself that He approved of. He does care what you wear 24/7. He does care that you are modest and He does care that once saved your outside reflects the inside change that He has made in your heart.

[Mommy2KandM]

He does care that you are modest and He does care that once saved your outside reflects the inside change that He has made in your heart.



agreed 100% and as I said before, our way of dressing should be modest each and ever day.:nod
I just don't feel a dress is required in order for a female to be modest.

[deafnc77]

I don't mean he actually take pictures. I meant he will cherish the moments. Yes, we should be at our best every day of the week but how often do we go to church to fellowship? We certainly don't go everyday.
That's why it is call for a celebration and be at our Sunday best. Sure I don't think the Lord cares if your dress is $60 or $3.00 . When I go to church, I don't wear dress to impress anyone, I dress as my Sunday best because I want to.

[Livin'4Him]

agreed 100% and as I said before, our way of dressing should be modest each and ever day.:nod
I just don't feel a dress is required in order for a female to be modest.You're exactly right. I wear Levi's and a t-shirt (usually a Christian t-shirt) and I don't give two hoots what anyone thinks of me, but thank goodness my church is also casual.

I say wear what the Lord convicts you to wear. If it's a dress, knock yourself out. If it's jeans, ditto. I will say however, I will not attend a church that requires a woman to dress a certain way. Churches need to cut that mess out. It makes some people not want to attend, and what if someone cannot afford to buy a dress for church? What then? Stay at home and feel defeated, because you have been made to feel, or possibly think the Lord looks down on you, because of what you can afford to wear.

[Mommy2KandM]

I don't mean he actually take pictures. I meant he will cherish the moments. .

I know it was a figure of speech. But my point is.. I honestly thing God is less interested in what we do for an hour at church, where often times Christians are acting. He is more interested in how we live our lives 24/6 than what we do sunday morning service. Because the 24/6 is what really shows where our relationship with God is. Anyone and everyone can act for at least an hour each week.

again, dresses are fine, if you prefer to wear them. But I don't think they are more modest or the required wear for women in church. Nor do I think men have to wear a tie. :laugh

[biblemommy]

I know it was a figure of speech. But my point is.. I honestly thing God is less interested in what we do for an hour at church, where often times Christians are acting. He is more interested in how we live our lives 24/6 than what we do sunday morning service. Because the 24/6 is what really shows where our relationship with God is. Anyone and everyone can act for at least an hour each week.

again, dresses are fine, if you prefer to wear them. But I don't think they are more modest or the required wear for women in church. Nor do I think men have to wear a tie. :laugh

I am going out on a limb guessing here, cuz I don't know OT laws that well, but maybe what we see as requirements today or atleast a habit today of dressing up, has some of its roots in what the priests were to wear when it was there turn in the tabernacle...they even had to wear a rope around them incase they were killed and had to be drug out..so maybe the tradition is somehow linked to that...
but I think your right its more important to always be about our Fathers business, than to put on heirs on sunday morning(or evening)
I LOVE easter dress season, but I don't see why folks go out and buy all the fanciest stuff just for one day..or christmas, I mean I know they are special holidays, but just getting dressed up for the sake of getting dressed up is ...silly I think..
and accept for what Jesus was dressed in after the ressurrection , I bet His clothes were pretty tattered and worn..so whose law is it that we dress up? gotta be mans...infact I think a man invented panty hose.. I do understand head coverings in scripture, but I don't see how pinning a hankerchief to ones head complies...its silly...
its funny actually, because of the dress code my folks had on me(always a dress on sundays)I decided to push my limits with them, and while still maintaining in dress,in my punk stage I would wear all sorts of strange things, I refrained from the black lipstick and blush on sundays, but I still looked really werid...so my folks stopped making me come!!hehehe:heh
But what about all those born again bikers?? they come in all clad in leather and fringe tatooed from head to toe...PTL they have a church to go to that doesn't require a dressy code...:clap

[deafnc77]

Might as well bring out this verse:

Rom 14:5 One man esteemeth one day above another: another esteemeth every day alike. Let every man be fully persuaded in his own mind