Question about someone talking down to you

[JustGodsChild]

How do you respond to someone who talks down to you? :noidea Other than self-control. :lol

I have a friend who husband is a believer. And he talks down to me and makes me feel that my beliefs are the wrong ones. And what he is saying is all correct. He tries to make me feel 2 feet tall. I just nod and try my best to explain my belief. But he talks over me. I even try to change the subject and talk about the kids, but he always brings it right back. I don't want to say anything out of line and disrespect my friend but sometimes my flesh just wants to yell, "You know, you don't know it all!" But I refrain. Anyone have any ideas how to handle this situation? :):

[cathy1953]

Aren't these type of people in the "bully" category?

I've met people like that, in fact I know one now, who will talk over you, and won't listen to a word anyone else says. Not necessarily about subjects within Christianity, tho. Just over anything. She just knows it all and won't listen to any other point of view.
So I try to avoid any argument or confrontation with this person, other than hello and goodbye.

[andy]

One word: Confront them. We, as christians, do not have to be walked on. Now we can be firm, yet Christlike. We do not resort to violence, cursing, or put downs ourselves, but we can be firm and state that this behavior offends us and to please, as a brother in Christ, please stop.

We do not have to be offensive at all. If the person continues then we should avoid that person while at the same time praying for them.

The above is my opinion. Of course, if the offensive person is not a christian, then the situation is much harder.

[ManhattanGuy]

Smack them.

[Proudmommy]

Pray for him. He sounds very immature in Christ, and the only way for him to get over that is to grow and mature. You can tell him, that you will not dicuss religion or Christianity with him anymore until he learns respect. Are you a woman? (Edited to add: Duh, your 110% Navy Wife banner should have give that away.) I ask because I wonder if he doesn't think that you aren't allowed to teach him anything because of that?

[Fairborough]

Good advice.


Scriptures which have helped me many times:

"If a wise man contendeth with a foolish man, whether he rage or laugh, there is no rest"
Proverbs 29:9

"Go from the presence of a foolish man, when thou perceivest not in him the lips of knowledge."
Proverbs 14:7



:)

[JustGodsChild]

Thanks for all the advice. I can't reallly avoid him because he is my good friend's husband and when we hang out, he is around sometimes. I don't deserve to be talked down to, that's for sure. But I don't want to take his abuse any longer either.

And yes, he is a Christian.

[Fairborough]

I have been in similar situations where people have established their power base, and they even end up controlled by it themselves.
In these cases I genuinely try to find something to agree with them on, maybe just here and there. This is more than just a tactic, but it is some fair play in the situation.
At least this would give you some initiative, and a better reference point to look back on - even for both sides.

We all want to be approved of, at least in some area. Maybe he is starved for attention.


My daughter did this with two of her students who were trying to give her a hard time. She sat down with them and asked them about their interests.
By doing this she gained two ardent fans who supported her from then on.




:)

[Cindybobindy]

I would probably say: "Gee...ya know...I really wish I could stay here and talk with you...but I need to go clean my toilets."


(and I'm serious)

Ok...maybe that is a bit harsh.....but I would find a reason to NOT stay engaged with his conversation at ALL.

If that doesn't work...then introduce him to Mamacags...she'd re-arrange his attitude for sure. :grin

[J4E]

Oh, I know they type all too aften. I simply say, thanx for your opinions but my interest lies in what god says, not what mortal man thinks.

[I Believe!!!]

Smack them.
:laugh Some people can really bring that out in us.

[Maria]

How do you respond to someone who talks down to you? :noidea Other than self-control. :lol

I have a friend who husband is a believer. And he talks down to me and makes me feel that my beliefs are the wrong ones. And what he is saying is all correct. He tries to make me feel 2 feet tall. I just nod and try my best to explain my belief. But he talks over me. I even try to change the subject and talk about the kids, but he always brings it right back. I don't want to say anything out of line and disrespect my friend but sometimes my flesh just wants to yell, "You know, you don't know it all!" But I refrain. Anyone have any ideas how to handle this situation? :):


I know what you mean!!!!!! With your suave, but FIRM ways, you can tell this person how you feel about the way he talks to you. The Bible says something about with our kindness you will quiet the mouth of the accuser or fool... something like that... but you know what I mean.

I had to talk like this to someone similar and kept my cool and talked in a gentle voice but firm. The other person got more angry, but I kept it cool...

It can be hard sometimes, but... just take a deep breath and tell all.. gently, of course...;):

[holyspiritvesse]

Tell him:

In Essentials, Unity

In Nonessentials, Liberty

In Everything else, Charity

[Elizabeth_S]

How do you respond to someone who talks down to you? :noidea Other than self-control. :lol

I have a friend who husband is a believer. And he talks down to me and makes me feel that my beliefs are the wrong ones. And what he is saying is all correct. He tries to make me feel 2 feet tall. I just nod and try my best to explain my belief. But he talks over me. I even try to change the subject and talk about the kids, but he always brings it right back. I don't want to say anything out of line and disrespect my friend but sometimes my flesh just wants to yell, "You know, you don't know it all!" But I refrain. Anyone have any ideas how to handle this situation? :):
I would tell him that "I am not going to talk with you until you speak with respect please. I do not appreciate your tone and talking down to me".

If you do not say this, he is going to keep on doing it, and it sends him a signal that you approve of his tone with you.

I feel if a person allows another person to talk to them like that, then you enable that person and give tacit approval of their attitude.

[nancy]

How about if instead of trying to explain your beliefs you start questioning him about some of the things he believes. Ask him why he believes that and if you have a verse that contradicts what he is saying then ask him "what about this verse (...). If he thinks you are interested in his opinion he may have a different tone with you.