please need Christian views on certain topic

[prov15_4]

Ok...I know this has been discussed on this board before, I would really like to see some real-time, fresh perspectives, opinions, views, preferably Biblically based...

Is pornography (when a husband is viewing it without the consent of his wife and even without telling the wife) considered adultery?

Thanks...don't want to beat a dead horse...but right now I am a little needy...

prov

[Hootmon]

Is pornography (when a husband is viewing it without the consent of his wife and even without telling the wife) considered adultery?Yes. You have heard that it was said to the ancients, "You shall not commit adultery." But I say to you that whoever looks on a woman to lust after her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
(Matthew 5:27-28) Even if the wife knows about it and doesnt disapprove, its still Adultery.

Even if she looks at it with him, its still Adultery.

Pornography is Spiritual poison. Believe me. I know what Im talking about from direct experience.

[PlentyGroovy]

I vote yes.

[IbeleiveinJesus]

Matthew 5:28 - But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.

Given the above verse, I think you can certainly say yes. However, from a practical standpoint, I think many married folks would see a difference in degree between their spouses looking at a porn, and bedding their next door neighbor. Though I don't in anyway diminish the horrible effects porn can have on individuals or a marriage... I agree with Hootman, it is poison...

-Ted

[twelvesmaster]

Ok...I know this has been discussed on this board before, I would really like to see some real-time, fresh perspectives, opinions, views, preferably Biblically based...

Is pornography (when a husband is viewing it without the consent of his wife and even without telling the wife) considered adultery?

Thanks...don't want to beat a dead horse...but right now I am a little needy...

prov


If you husband loves the Lord, then maybe he'll think this verse is important --

1 Peter 1:13-17 Wherefore gird up the loins of your mind, be sober, and hope to the end for the grace that is to be brought unto you at the revelation of Jesus Christ; As obedient children, not fashioning yourselves according to the former lusts in your ignorance: But as he which hath called you is holy, so be ye holy in all manner of conversation; Because it is written, Be ye holy; for I am holy. And if ye call on the Father, who without respect of persons judgeth according to every man's work, pass the time of your sojourning here in fear:

That pretty much clears it up for believers.

[AnyDayNow]

Here is a link which may be helpful:

Is Pornography Harmful? (http://www.rr-bb.com/showthread.php?t=192960&highlight=pornography)

[prov15_4]

thanks all...yes I wholeheartedly agree with the YES answer...now...on to another question...

G*d "allows" divorce in the circumstance of adultery...even though He hates it, it is "allowed"...

Could a wife (in good conscience) hand her husband a bill of divorce for adultery in the form of pornography? This is after the husband really does not admit/think he has a "problem" and it's the "wife's problem" and the wife's fault, and he is not willing to go through marital counseling.

The husband is not a professing Christian, but is much loved by his wife.

She has been trying to follow Paul's directions for such circumstances...staying, not leaving, setting a good example, forgiving. and forgiving. and forgiving.

Thank you each one (twelvesmaster, IbelieveinJesus, PlentyGroovy, Hootmon) for your responses.

[prov15_4]

thanks AnyDayNow, too...you posted while I was replying...lol

[Hootmon]

Could a wife (in good conscience) hand her husband a bill of divorce for adultery in the form of pornography? This is after the husband really does not admit/think he has a "problem" and it's the "wife's problem" and the wife's fault, and he is not willing to go through marital counseling.

The husband is not a professing Christian, but is much loved by his wife.

She has been trying to follow Paul's directions for such circumstances...staying, not leaving, setting a good example, forgiving. and forgiving. and forgiving.I would say that there are a few more 'steps' between 'staying' and 'divorce'. A separation may drive the point home and avoid the need for Divorce, and you seem to recognize that DIvorce is seen by God as an option of Last Resort.

That being said, if the man is an unbeliever, that may not work either. Pornography is not seen as being 'wrong' anymore from a cultural standpoint.

[twelvesmaster]

Could a wife (in good conscience) hand her husband a bill of divorce for adultery in the form of pornography? This is after the husband really does not admit/think he has a "problem" and it's the "wife's problem" and the wife's fault, and he is not willing to go through marital counseling.
Gee, that's a tough one. I don't honestly know how anyone who doesn't know you two personally can advise divorce. A third party who knows you both and is respected by both of you, IMO, should help you with such a serious decision.

Does your church have Elders, and would they be willing to try a home visit?

[IbeleiveinJesus]

Does your church have Elders, and would they be willing to try a home visit

:nod, I think that is good advice...

-Ted

[prov15_4]

There are elders/pastors/counselors in the church that *I* attend...I go alone, he does not go to church. The last time I got someone to talk to "us" as a couple, things just blew up...bad. So...yes that is wonderful advice and something I would love to do...but he would not be responsive to that to say the least.

Do you think me going to someone (Christian counselor-like) alone would help me, as he is not wanting any help?

Just please pray for me...this really sucks.

I know some of you know that well more than I do...

Thanks more than I can say,
prov

[IbeleiveinJesus]

Do you think me going to someone (Christian counselor-like) alone would help me, as he is not wanting any help?

Yes, defineately... Praying for you prov...:pray

-Ted

[Patty T]

Yes, go alone. I'm praying God will soften your husband's heart and draw him to the truth and saving knowledge of Jesus as Lord and Savior.

I am also praying for your pastor/counselor that God will give them divine wisdom.

Blessed is the man (or woman) who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor stands in the path of sinners, nor sits in the seat of the scornful; but his delight is in the law of the Lord, and in His law he meditates day and night. He shall be like a tree planted by the rivers of water, that brings forth its fruit in its season, whose leaf also shall not wither; and whatever he does shall prosper.

Psalm 1:1-3

[cindyl1]

oh this is such a nasty situation. My heart goes out to you!