Question for those who attended Christian schools

[sarahbeth]

Did you see a real difference in Christian School kids as opposed to those that went to public school ?

*(edit to add) Even if you did not attend Christian School I would still like your observation.


friends, Sarah

[frisian1970]

Did you see a real difference in Christian School kids as opposed to those that went to public school ?




friends, Sarah

The church I attended as a kid was a mix, in other words about half went to Christian schools and half to public schools. I didn't really see a difference.

That said, my children attend private Christian school.

[AnyDayNow]

Yes. I went K-8 to Lutheran grade school. Education wise, only one kid in my class of 28 scored lower than the "above median" score for entering Algebra in public school ninth grade. We were all better spellers than most of the public school kids, mainly because our grade school still believed in phonics (which is how my German grandmother learned English as a FIRST language!).

Socially was a different story. While we were somewhat sheltered in parochial school, the only advantage we had was knowing what behavior was supposed to be wrong. Years later I told a fellow grade school classmate who was then a Lutheran school Principal that one thing we did learn FAST socially in public school were the CONSEQUENCES of bad behavior. We were always told that there would be consequences, but because we didn't get the chance to behave badly in grade school, we never experienced them.

Spiritually, at least in my case, there wasn't much difference. I wasn't a true Believer until some years later, after high school. I was always a moral person, but I only did it to avoid the "consequences", not because I saw it as a way to salvation or a testimony of some sort. Didn't even understand what TRULY good behavior was until I became a Christian. In fact, I was pretty much clueless about everything until then. :lol

[ShagNappy]

Yeah, there was more booze, tobacco use and sexual activity... My school, and every Christian school my friends went to over the years was the same way. My parents finally gave up and put me back in public school my junior and senior year.

Now, the elementary and some of the middle school grades were better than public school, but high school... bah.

[frisian1970]

Yeah, there was more booze, tobacco use and sexual activity... My school, and every Christian school my friends went to over the years was the same way. My parents finally gave up and put me back in public school my junior and senior year.

Now, the elementary and some of the middle school grades were better than public school, but high school... bah.

Hmm, forgot about that part. Yeah, my Christian high school was similiar.

[sarahbeth]

AnyDayNow,

Thanks :): That is what I am most interested in: the spiritual aspect.

I was brought up in public schools and believed quite a lot of the garbage....but years later became a believer.


friends, Sarah

[sarahbeth]

Yeah, there was more booze, tobacco use and sexual activity...


:freaked Sarah

[sarahbeth]

Bump :):

[Ben Ready]

Yes, I went to Christian schools most of my "school days". Although I did go the way of the world for a while, I did finally turn back to Christ. I believe you get a better education and much better influences on your life in a Christian schoool, but ultimately sinners will be sinners. I believe it's all in what you are given to work with and what you do with it that counts. If this is a thread to help you make a decision on whether or not to spend the money on Christian schooling, then I say make the investment, it will pay off in the long run.

One other option is home schooling. My sister and SIL are both home schooling their boys with the Bob Jones University home school programs. If anyone would like more information on this you can go to:

http://www.bjup.com/services/bjhomesat/

[BHiles]

I went to Christian Schools most of my life. And My Children have all attended Christians schools for all of their lives. The difference in the kids that attended Christian schools compared to public schools was strictly in the difference of the parental involvement in the young persons' life.

The Parent has the obligation to be in that child's life in every aspect. Christian schools have a greater potential to teach your children your values than public schools do but that in no way allows you to send them off and not stay intimately involved in their life and study. Far to many people send their children off to be spiritually baby sat in a chrisitian school and the kids turn out wicked as the devil. It is the Parents responsibility to teach their children the way of the Lord.

The school should only be a means to help the parent accomplish this goal.

[Viro]

Let's just say this. The evil was underlying with several kids in my Christian prep school, but the environment did wonders for me. I did not have one drink, smoke a single cigarrette, or touch a girl in an inappropriate manner. I would not be where I am today if my parents did not make the scrifice to send me to a Christian school.

[tractsforchrist]

I went to a catholic christian school (I am ex-catholic so no flames) Even though there were some problems with the school (Namely I hated the school for some reasons) it depended on the child. While in school, everyone was to be polite say prayers and have religion class 45 minutes a day (church on Fridays). Some of the children were rotten but there was strict discipline for not acting like a christian. When released into public school, the rotten ones became really rotten and the good ones continued to be good. :):

[mrshoward]

I attended a fundamentalist Baptist high scholl in the 70's. I'm glad I got the education I did, especially the spiritual education, but since then I've rebelled and so have a lot of my class mates. I've come back to the Lord, but I had a lot of resentment about some of the things that were done at that school. When I saw the advertisement for the movie "Saved," I thought, why should I see that? I've lived it!

At our 25th reunion last summer, there was quite difference in how we all turned out. Many were in full-time ministry, but many were in the world, having rejected Christianty. As others have posted, I think it depends on the person and the parental involvement. My parents were cold, angry, legalistic and judgemental, and I wasn't allowed to make any desicions for myself, especially ones that might lead to SIN! So I got out of high school I couldn't wait to get out into the world---it just seemed so much better than what I had grown up with. Of course it wasn't, but I wish I could have learned that while still a teenager. Maybe attending a regular high school would have been better for me, if I could have made my own mistakes then I wouldn't have had to make them later.

[sarahbeth]

I was hoping for more replies, but these so far are helpful. Thankyou.


When I saw the advertisement for the movie "Saved," I thought, why should I see that? I've lived it!

mrshoward, why was that? What is the movie about?

friends, Sarah

[J&J's mom]

I went to a public elementary & jr high, and Christian high school. Because I was 14, and the school was Baptist (my parents attended a non-denominational church) I hated the strictness, of course. :B: In my opinion - looking back at everyone who went - the spiritual guidance we received was irreplaceable. Of course we had the sex, drug use, alcohol... but not to the extent of the public schools. Most of us ended up really good kids - following God, and many are in ministry (as mrshoward said.)

I'd have to say that personally, the Bible teaching was so fundamental and has been the foundation of what I know. I wouldn't have had that base without a Christian school. Having Biblical instruction every day was really worthwhile. For this reason, we have decided to place our DS in Christian school. What he comes home with at age 6... the wise words of biblical wisdom... are priceless. :nod

[Sakrysta]

I grew up in a fundamental, non-denominational Christian school. There were definitely those who took Christianity seriously and those who didn't, but as someone said above, that mostly had to do with their family backgrounds. It doesn't matter what they teach you in school; if it's not supported and modeled at home, it's almost assured that it will not make an impact.

The Christian school is not responsible for the child's education. The parents are. If the parents decide to employ a Christian school to aid in the education of their children, that's great. But the parents are responsible to know what their children are being taught and to reinforce those principles in the home. Parents cannot moan that Johnny didn't turn out right even though they sent him to the best Christian school and they attended church regularly. Those are both good things to do, but if the children don't see in their parents' examples how to live the Christian life, the other things are no guarantee that they will be faithful as adults.

I work some with the young people in my church, and I see a definite difference in the public school kids and the Christian school kids. The public school kids' values and priorities are SO screwed up. But honestly, I put just as much fault for that on the parents as I do on the school.

I don't have children yet. But I am setting goals for if I ever do. Unless I can find a superb Christian school for them to attend, we WILL home school, even if we have to live without some luxuries to do so. And we will not have cable. Television will be limited to what mom and dad buy or rent and preview. I see so many kids, and even myself, getting so swept up in the world through the media of music and television. That's not the kind of home I want to have.

[sarahbeth]

I see so many kids, and even myself, getting so swept up in the world through the media of music and television. That's not the kind of home I want to have.


Me either :(: Sarah

[sarahbeth]

I really hate to bump this again, but I need more imput. Thanks to all so far!!!


friends, Sarah

[seeker42]

but I need more imput.

Why ???
:confused


Seeker

[kattallysn1]

I went to a christian school from kindergarten through 7th grade. as far as the kids go, they are the same as public school kids. they all get in trouble. christian schools can be good for discipline and educational purposes. i think really though a christian kid should be in public school just so he/she can be a witness to all the other kids that aren't saved.

[olabashanda]

o.k.

Grew up in a home with an alcoholic father and a very rebellious mother who was technically saved (she just got it right in the last mother after almost dying at age 63). The "good Bible-believing evangelical church" I went to had a school attached (Grace Community in Tempe). I went there after my public school closed down in 3rd grade. There was alot of sexual sin in the church and in the school among the adults, but the overall sin level wasn't that high (I'm sure compared to public elementary and jr. high schools). This was the mid 1980's by the way.

I went to public high school, and fell deeper into to sin at a not very steep rate.
HOWEVER, most all of the kids who went to a "solid evangelical Christian high school" were MUCH MORE REBELLIOUS. I can't really name one of them that is serving the Lord, or serving the Lord with enough of a witness. I think there are problems with externally enforcing religion, and holy living, especially to high schoolers. If Jesus isn't in you, if you are sold out to Him and if you haven't made some serious decisions to not live in sin, and if you aren't SOLID in a good church God has called you to (and this isn't internalized), you will have difficulties. It probably should be done BEFORE high school, or it's hard to put that cat back in that bag.

Away from home at a public college, I went deep into sin and rebellion, until I got saved in college through a charismatic local church who is 70% college students, about 400 members.


I WOULD SOONER CHOP OFF MY OWN ARMS AND LEGS THAN SEND MY KID TO PUBLIC SCHOOL (he's not in school yet).
I WOULD SOONER CHOP OFF MY OWN ARMS THAN SEND MY KID TO A PRIVATE CHRISTIAN SCHOOL.
This is after having gone to both.

Home schooling is my only good option. The Bible ALWAYS gives the responsibility of education to the parents (I'm not imposing my convictions on anyone else. Everyone will answer to God themselves.)

[sarahbeth]

So far I'm not seeing too much difference "spiritually" between Christian school and public school kids.

friends, Sarah

[J&J's mom]

So far I'm not seeing too much difference "spiritually" between Christian school and public school kids.

friends, Sarah


If you are basing this observation on our 15 replies.. you might think again. I work in a public school system w/problem kids. Everytime I go to my son's Christian school, I see a HUGE difference in their behavior. Vulgarity, crudeness, bad jokes, the way they treat each other - it's so much better in the Christian school setting.

I'm not sure what you mean by "spiritually" - each person is an individual, and their relationship with God has more to do than what school they attended. It does have alot to do with their upbringing, and their personality as well. I do know that some of my friends were rebellious - myself included. But I know very few people who never went thru a rebellious stage. My friends who struggled were the ones who had very strict disciplinary parents - everything was black or white. They had to be perfect Christian teens - which isn't possible. I did better because my parents were more well-rounded. I only had a 6 month rebellious streak when I was in college. (which again - I think is normal.)

I think there are pros and cons about Christian, public, and homeschooling. It all depends on the school, community, parents, teachers, and the child.

So we understand more - are you asking all this because of your own children? :confused

[sarahbeth]

I'm not sure what you mean by "spiritually" - each person is an individual, and their relationship with God has more to do than what school they attended. It does have alot to do with their upbringing, and their personality as well.

You're getting close to what I'm interested in. So in your opinion, will people raised with godly parents, who attend christian schools and church, and have good personalities be more likely be born again? I would hate to think all this effort would result in an outward "show" of Christianity and not true salvation.


friends, Sarah

[ShoutToTheLord]

I was raised by Catholic parents who for them church was just what you did for an hour on Sunday.They are good moral people but have no walk with Jesus ( they believe ) but have no growth. I went to public schools at a very rough time during the 70's and was in 3rd grade the year public bussing started in my home town of Pontiac Michigan. There were riots and I was so scared during those first years. My education was not as it should have been and I saw and experience things that I would not wish on any kid. I survived, moved and have 2 kids that we now financially sacrifice to send to our Lutheran church school. I love it for them although the school isn't without problems., no church or school is. My son has 1 more year left and then we have decided to send him into the public schools because as so many have said here we don't see the difference in the public high schools and the Lutheran high school as far as social problems. What I am getting at is ... the difference in your walk has little to do with where you go to school. Its what you follow in your actions and obedience to our Lord Jesus. School is no different than a work place; you need a strong desire to follow Jesus because temptation will be whereever us sin filled humans are.

[J&J's mom]

You're getting close to what I'm interested in. So in your opinion, will people raised with godly parents, who attend christian schools and church, and have good personalities be more likely be born again? I would hate to think all this effort would result in an outward "show" of Christianity and not true salvation.


friends, Sarah

that's a tough question - the "more likely to be born again" part really strikes me. The Bible says in Proverbs 22:6 "Train up a child in the way of the Lord and when he is old, he will not depart from it." I interpret that to mean that even God thinks that children born and raised in a Christian home will turn to Him.

However, look at ANY Christian family, and you'll see at least one person who is not following Christ. Here's an example from my family. Mom, Dad, 3 kids: Christian schools, church, raised by Godly parents, etc. 2 of us kids are doing great - Born again Christians - godly families, etc etc. My brother???? He was "saved" when he was little - raised exactly like me & sis, but he's a mess. When you ask him the basics of Chrisitanity - does he believe that Jesus died for his sins - that he is the son of God - that he is in Heaven and will come again for us... he will tell you that he believes that. But he doesn't live like it. Who am I to say if he's a Christian or not? We want to think he is, but that is between him and God. My parents did everything they could to "raise him in the way of the Lord" but my brother has chosen not to live that way right now.

There will ALWAYS be people also who walk the walk, and talk the talk, and never actually "accept" Christ and live for Him. In that sense, you would have an outward show and no true salvation. But it's not up to us to judge that. As a parent, my job is to "train up my kids in the way of the Lord." Once they are grown, they will be responsible for their own actions and beliefs. Only God will know their heart.

Still wondering why you are interested in this topic? :):

[olabashanda]

You're getting close to what I'm interested in. So in your opinion, will people raised with godly parents, who attend christian schools and church, and have good personalities be more likely be born again? I would hate to think all this effort would result in an outward "show" of Christianity and not true salvation.
friends, Sarah

I think many do have only an outward show, and may not be Christians, but who am I to say?

I would say "people raised with godly parents, who attend christian schools and church, and have good personalities be more likely be born again"
ARE MORE LIKELY TO BE BORN AGAIN, *but* Satan can appear as an angel of light, so we are to be wise as serpents and innocent as doves.



Still wondering why you are interested in this topic? :):

That would be helpful.

[HiLaReE320]

I attended a private Christian school for some of 7th and all of 8th grade, and I attended a public school after that. I liked it a lot, but after 8th grade we moved and just couldn't afford it anymore. The people there, I don't think, weren't any more "Christian" than those in the public school I go to (I happened to have went to a very good public school, here in the Bible belt :): ). My experience was that at the Christian school I went to, a lot of the kids were kids that had been kicked out of public school, or were very rebellious, and their parents sent them to a Christian school to hope to "tame" them or whatever. Well, that never worked out.

But I liked it because they would have Chapel on Wednesday mornings, and that's actually when I became a Christian and learned about salvation. I had grown up in a Christian home per se, but my parents never really shared anything about the Bible with me (WHY, I have no idea, still to this day... Sometimes I resent them for that). I also loved being able to study the Bible everyday in class and have discussions. I missed that all throughout high school. When I have kids I will probably find a good Christian school and send them there. But then again, where I live, Christianity and Jesus are discussed openly and acceptedly in the public high school I just graduated from. I never learned about evolution because my biology teacher was a Christian (actually all of my teachers were Christian) and she didnt believe in that "crap", so she didn't teach it. :):

If you had to choose public over private... I would only do it if you find yourself a good Christian town.. Especially here in the south, Alabama in particular (just not a big city like Birmingham.. awful schools). But thats just my 2 cents!

[mrshoward]

mrshoward, why was that? What is the movie about?

friends, Sarah

Sarahbeth, the movie (I haven't seen it, but have read reviews) is about a Baptist high school. One of the young men is homosexual and is sent to a re-education type of a place. His girlfriend believes she has a vision from Jesus to cure him of his homosexuality by having sex with him, so she does, only to become pregnant and therefore be shunned by her friends. The only people to befriend her at that point are the 2 unsaved kids in the school.

I got in a lot of trouble my senior year by wearing an Elton Joh tee-shirt to a school choir practive. Now, I had no idea this was going to get me in trouble, nor did I wear it to "stick it to" the choir director, but that's what he accused me of, and I was kicked out of the choir and put on "probation" for the rest of the year. For wearing a shirt my mother had bought me. It was so petty and I felt so betrayed. And some of my friends stepped back from me to avoid becoming associated with me. Really left a bitter taste in my mouth and I haven't really forgiven that choir director. And I'm 44 years old now! It's just that stupid legalism and as others have said, surface Christianity I can't stand. That entire situation did not make me a better Christian. In fact, it took me hitting bottom through drugs and alcohol to make me run towards Christ---but that's a different thread all toghether.

however, I would love to see my grandson in a Christian school, since it would be "safer" than the public schools. I have nieces in public high schools and one of them got beat up by a gang (and she's good girl, wasn't looking for trouble). And I did get a very good Christian education which I fall back on now.

So if I were to give you advice, I'd say, send your kids to Christian school, or hone school them. I wish I'd done that with my kids.

[sarahbeth]

I home school the youngest one. The oldest (9th gr.) is in public although attended Christian kg-6th.

The one in public wants to stay there and hated Christian school. My little one I don't know what to do. She wants to go to public this fall. She is very tender hearted and loves the Lord so much.

Our son tells us that public school kids were "way nicer" than the CS kids. :confused He hated the dress code also and began to dread all the scripture memorization. I was afraid he might get bitter where scripture was concerned having it forced on him.

I have so many Christian friends telling me what a horrible mess my kids will be if I send them to public school.

I thought hearing first hand what others experienced might help my decision.

friends, Sarah

[J&J's mom]

Sarahbeth - thanks for the insight. It makes it so much easier to understand your questions. :):


I don't believe that your kids will be a "horrible mess" if you send them to public schools. If that was the case, we'd all be in trouble! :lol Over this summer, I've debated pulling my DS1 from the CS and placing him in public. I've talked to TONS of people - public, private, (my supervisor oversees the entire special ed dept for the elem. school system) My son w/be in 2nd grade and my concern is that he'll have the same teacher for the 3rd year in a row. I won't go into the whole mess here, but I finally decided to keep him in the CS for one more year - if he continues to have problems (he struggles academically and is a little immature w/ADD tendencies) I will place him in public. I think good parenting and a good relationship with the school and teacher - plus good communication w/your kids is the key. And lots of prayer! :nod

If either way is an option for you, and your youngest wants to try public (you've already experienced CS w/your daughter) then why not try and see how it goes? You can always move him, right?

Sounds like you are a great mom! :hug

[sarahbeth]

And lots of prayer! Yes, prayer is the only thing that gives me peace these days raising kids!

Sounds like you are a great mom! Oh, thankyou J&J's mom, so very, very much! You don't know how much I needed to hear this today!

Thanks to you all for the imput.....and I can't find that cute little hugs smilie? ..but hugs to you all and may the Lord help us all follow His will with our kids. Sarah

[jumpinforjoy]

This is from a parents perspective. My children went to a Christian school and I would recommend it to anyone who wants real values for their kids.

The educational level is far superior and learning is stressed. Study tips are explained and implemented as a routine. Structure in anything makes it easier.

As far as kids attending, there was little difference in the behavior outside of school. Parents seemed to think just because their kids were getting religious and moral training they were trustworthy in what ever they said they were doing. Teens are teens!

Yes, there was more parental involvement in school, but not in social gatherings. Parents seemed like they had blinders on. Just because they went to a Christian school and church they wouldn’t do anything wrong...Teens will be teens! On a percentage, there was as much drugs, alcohol and sex as any school. They were just sneakier and always had someone cover.

I know this because I am a parent who wanted to know where and with who my kids were with. I didn’t hesitate to check. They weren’t sheltered, they were informed and expected to follow through and not lie about their whereabouts. They knew what to expect if they were caught at the wrong place with the wrong people doing the wrong thing.

When they went away to college they had an educational background that prepared them for study and achievement. They got into some things they shouldn’t have while at college. Now that they are grown, all the teachings are evident in their daily life. Today they are honest, hard working successful contributing adults with a firm walk with the Lord.

Yes, I owe a lot to their Christian education!

[kattallysn1]

I would recommend it to anyone who wants real values for their kids.




just because people don't send thier kids to christian schools doesn't mean we don't want "real values" for our kids. :rolleyes

[Skamperoni]

My DH went to catholic schools all the way through college. He said the drugs and booze were better as the kids had more money.

NOW~
My boys go to christian schools,and the educations they received were sub standard. Steve transferred to oublic school last year at age 14, and played heck getting caught up.
Greg is currently going to Sylva for tutoring 2x's a week to get up to 6th grade level.

The level of incompitence is the same in public vs private schools, I"m afraid.
But in private christain schools, they get Bible class!

[jumpinforjoy]

Originally Posted by jumpinforjoy
I would recommend it to anyone who wants real values for their kids.

Reply posted by kattallysn1
"just because people don't send thier kids to christian schools doesn't mean we don't want "real values" for our kids. "

I'm sorry you took my statement to mean something I never intended it to mean. I am well aware there are many, many parents giving their children "real values".

[SpiritCentered]

My observation has been from both having graduated from a Christian school and from my nephew currently attending a Christian school that there are a LOT of parents out there who send their kids to these schools to teach them values they choose not to teach them at home. That messes kids up...being taught one way and seeing parents their parents living another.


k

[architectlink]

I was born and raised in a Methodist church and see no real difference.

HOWEVER, my kids attend a Christian school now and it is vastly different from other private schools....they are learning scripture and have chapel every day and love Jesus.

[Mr. Igg]

My wife attended a Christian school from 3rd-8th grade and she talks frequently about how much she loved it. When she attended a public high school in 1984 (a well-to-do public school at that), she was shocked at the dramatic difference. She had not been exposed to students cursing, talking openly about sex and drugs, and blatant disrespect for authority figures. None of that would have been tolerated in her Christian school.

However, we have friends who have pulled their kids out of Christian schools in the past few years because of extremely cliquish behavior among the students and extreme legalism in the school's teachings. Not every Christian school is the same.

[SvdByGrace]

I went to a Christian school from K-7. K-6 grade was a very structured school. I didn't even know curse words until I went my 7th grade year to another private school. At that school I went through a lot. Lets just say, it was worse than public school. It was like they took all the kids who were kicked out of public school and stuck them together in this school. I learned things that I shouldn't have known.

If you are looking to send your kid to private school, check it out. It all depends on the school. I was protected from k-6th grade and flourished until I went to that other school. It depends on the structure of the school and who they let go there. Talk to parents, the pastor, etc.

I have seen kids who went to private schools throughout their school years and they really flourished in school and out.