Offensive or Improper Clothing?????

[Kriscabob]

What exactly is offensive or improper?? I wear shorts, short shorts but not that show my um, bottom and I have been known to wear midriff shirts not since my second pregnancy though and whan I am riding my bike for the exersize I wear the sports bra and bike shorts so am I against God in any way?? Suddenly very concerned, I just never thought about it before.:eek

[aboundingjoy]

I have to go to bed but want to answer quickly.

Awhile ago a thread about skirt lengths came up and I had just noticed I had the shortest skirt at church--something a poster said led me to start wearing my longer skirts to church--But I do still wear the shorter ones where I feel its okay.

If it bothers you, try something else--I didn't really think about it but the short skirts in church could have distracted from the whole reason people are there--It's a matter of being conscious of your effect on others and not putting a stumbling block in someone's way, I think.

[pam2003]

I would sum it up to this....if it makes the guys drool when you ride by, then it probably isn't good to wear it out. I'm sure your hubby likes it, but so do a lot of other guys, and that is when it becomes wrong. I had to scrap some new tanks that I bought, 2 in particular. They made me uncomfortable to be around other guys in because of that stupid look they get on their faces when they see something they like. Until guys, change, which we know won't happen, we have to watch ourselves. Wear it around the house though, their probably comfortable. Hope this helps!

[Blackened]

Just a thought.

Sometimes these things cause men to stumble.

There are lots of women at church who wear things to church that I wish they wouldnt just because I look, they look sexy or whatever, and right there Ive either committed adultery in a sense etc...

Maybe Im the only man who feels this way, but I dont think so.

:sigh

[Jade]

Are you asking out of curiosity, or because the Holy Spirit is convicting you?

If you feel convicted, then you already know what you should do.

We should not wear clothes that cause others to stumble, within reason. I am not advocating burka like clothes, nor should you stop wearing shorts. You should pay some attention to modesty though.

Personally I would wear shorts that are not too short (but I'm fat so that's a different horror story). I'm not to sure about the bare midriff, but that's just my personal choice. I really think you need to decide for yourself what is proper.

[Danimus]

Originally posted by Blackened
Just a thought.

Sometimes these things cause men to stumble.

There are lots of women at church who wear things to church that I wish they wouldnt just because I look, they look sexy or whatever, and right there Ive either committed adultery in a sense etc...

Maybe Im the only man who feels this way, but I dont think so.

:sigh

You are absolutely not the only man who feels that way.

[Vaughn]

I have no idea why this thread is in End Times Chat however...

I felt the need to comment for two reasons:

1) is not a basic standard set out in scripture on how a Christian woman should present herself?

2) as a male who has struggled with unpure thoughts i can attest to the damage done by women who have dressed inappropriately. I by no means intend to transfer blame for my shortcomings on to others, however the unmodest woman will certainly fan the flames of lust.

I find the way many young women dress today disgusting.

Feminine is cool, skimpy is trashy. (my personal opinion)

[antsinmypants]

VAughn - you are right.

Aish.com recently did a great article about modesty--- and I saw it make it's rounds in our synogogue... Many were convicted.. and I am one of them -

I have always dressed "Modestly"- - but I realised lately, that I had been wearing shorts that had shown more leg than I am now comfortable with (three inches above the knee) and jeans that were fairly tight (but not too tight) and tank tops, or low cut shirts.

I don't exactly advocate burkhas, but I have come to realise a few things...

Headcoverings- still mandated.

Once I started following that, I started realising that my type of dress was a bit too revealing... and i've begun purging my wardrobe...

I've also begun searching for longer skirts for work, and for synogogue (since I am on the praise team and I dance- - and long skirts are a MUST).. and for more modest, not-tight tops.

My brother, dad and cousin- and no doubt- my uncles, have had some major problems in the church with women wearing shirts, dresses, skirts, pants or shorts that are immodest..
Many don't even realise they're immodest-- but when you're in a sound booth upstairs, you can see down' EVERYONE's Blouse or dress-- and it's not even intentional.

I noticed this as well. :(::

I wish that more women would realise that alot of what they wear isn't modest- and would change that!!!!!!!!

And that is being said from another woman!

If a guy is drooling, and he's not your husband.. odds are it's immodest.. If you ask your dad, brother or husband or fiance- and they say it looks sexy, odds are- it is.. don't wear it outside :P:

Another thing- one that my mom has always said to us girls:
"If Jesus came back and saw you in that, would you feel comfortable? If so- ok. If not- go change and don't wear that outside of the house."

I've found that to be a good guideline up until this year, then I started doing more introspection, and found that I need to change my wardrobe and be alot more modest than I was.... Even my parents and fiance have remarked that my wardrobe is better than it was..
and I know mine wasn't bad!! esp compared to "everyone else"-- even in the church or synogogue!


Beneath the Surface: A deeper look at Modesty (http://www.aish.com/societywork/women/Beneath_the_Surface_A_Deeper_Look_at_Modesty.asp)

[grace4me]

Originally posted by Blackened
Just a thought.

Sometimes these things cause men to stumble.

There are lots of women at church who wear things to church that I wish they wouldnt just because I look, they look sexy or whatever, and right there Ive either committed adultery in a sense etc...

Maybe Im the only man who feels this way, but I dont think so.

:sigh

Man... you are not the only one again! I have grown up in a very traditional methodist church in Malaysia. I would like to tell you that I share the same feeling as what you have said in your thread. I guess nowsday, ladies wearing any clothing without a consideration of what a men will react! I am talking about people who go to church and join any church related activity.

God has created men to be sexually activated by sight and women by touched. And as you see one of your sister n Christ wear any revealing clothing, lust will be activated by sight. This remind me of one of Jesus fameous teaching "If you see a women and have lust in your eye... You commit adultery! That can be lead to death according to OT leviticus law. This is a long term war with the Prince of Darkness. I guess me and other brothers need tons of prayer from all of you.

I think we probably need a dress code for people who go to church. Any input?

By all mean, I do not intend to criticise what a lady should or should not dress while they go to church. It is just how I feel while I read the thread.

God Bless

[mama2kira]

I have a question about this. I understand the need for modesty. I only wear dresses and skirts to church, shorts at home and when I work. ( I clean other people's houses) I live in jeans in the winter, not tight ones though. Nothing see through, or above the navel when I wear t-shirts. My question is this-what about when I go to the swimming pool at the YMCA with my little ones? I don't want to attract looks, and my bathing suit is modest, if you could call a bathing suit modest, but I don't want to have to wear shorts and a t to swim in the pool....any thoughts appreciated.

[KrispyKritter]

I will throw my hand up too... I struggle with my eyes when a woman wears something that is too revealing. I work out all the time... but I have stopped going to the gym because of this. Fortunately I have a buddy who is a physical theropist and he and I work out together at his office... no women present. He does that for the same reason as me.

The way some women dress on Sunday morning causes many a man to commit adultry in his heart when he started the morning intending to worship God.

This topic has come up numerous times, and usually some woman comes on and says "well, men are pigs if they cant control their eyes!" ... to which I have to ask... why do you dress in that manner? If it isnt to draw the attention of men, then why do it?

[KrispyKritter]

Originally posted by mama2kira
I have a question about this. I understand the need for modesty. I only wear dresses and skirts to church, shorts at home and when I work. ( I clean other people's houses) I live in jeans in the winter, not tight ones though. Nothing see through, or above the navel when I wear t-shirts. My question is this-what about when I go to the swimming pool at the YMCA with my little ones? I don't want to attract looks, and my bathing suit is modest, if you could call a bathing suit modest, but I don't want to have to wear shorts and a t to swim in the pool....any thoughts appreciated.

Same rules apply... go to the Y for swimming when its just women. If a dress can cause lust, how much more a bathing suit?

[Jennie in TO]

Concerning the questions about swimming and working out: My rule is that I wear the most modest thing, no matter what the clothing. Swimming and exercising are part of our culture and are considered acceptable by most.

When I swim I wear the most modest bathing suit I can....one piece, not highcut or lowcut in any of THOSE places;): ...and no patterns or colours or accessories which will attract attention in THOSE places either. What I mean by that is that a cheetah pattern is a cheetah pattern no matter how modest the bathing suit. A colour block streaking racily across the bustline is going to attract attention. Just get plain and modest. This is coming from a 39 year old thin woman with a good figure. Don't flaunt it.

Working out I wear a loose, cotton t-shirt with sleeves. Lots of air circulation and it wicks the sweat but it doesn't show off any bouncing bustlines or anything else. I wear workout pants that are loose but are made of special material that wicks away the sweat. Most gyms are air-conditioned, and most bike rides are too, if you go fast enough and if the clothing is loose enough to allow the air to circulate around you.

I can guarantee you, that know guys are stumbling. Most don't even look at me. Accept my husband, but that is allowed, and I reward him for his attentions!
;):

[glorymj]

My daughters asked pretty much the same thing when we were going over the passage about modesty in the bible, and we sat down as a family to try and discover what some modest guidelines are that they could easily follow when they were shopping.

Hoping this is helpful to someone, here is the list:

#1. Top collars must not go lower than one hand-breadth below the neck. Reason? So that when you bend over (or if someone is seated above you) you are not showing more than you intended.

#2. Loose shorts and dresses must touch the knee. Reason? So that when you bend over, you do not show more than you intended.

#3. Any clothing you wear should be loose enough to not show the form of your body. Reason? So that you do not unintentionally give someone a graphic description of the size and shape of your body by the clothing you wear.

#4. Shorts and pants are allowable, but they must be loose enough to follow rule #3 - even when bending over. (That pretty much disallows most shorts and pants, but we have found (or made) a few that follow the guidelines.) They should also follow rule #2 for consistency and because parts of the thigh can easily cause minds to wander higher. Besides, if they are loose enough for #3, they may also be loose enough to show your bottom when you bend over!

#5. Women's clothing should be feminine, Men's clothing should be masculine as much as possible. That doesn't mean always ribbons and lace, but we tend to stay away from the harsh masculine suits for the women and the boys don't wear pink tops, for example. This rule is hard to determine sometimes because so much of our clothing is neutral. Reason? Because God's word tells us to, for one, and also because it helps us to naturally understand that men and women are different, with different roles. It makes our home much more harmonious, I think.

No, we don't wear swimsuits. We wear biker shorts, lined sports bras for the ladies, and long t-shirts instead. No one really thinks twice about us. We don't look odd, and we can still participate in swimming activities without causing a brother (or sister!) to stumble.

The men follow the same guidelines, even wearing shirts. I personally think that men who do not wear shirts can be sexy, so I assume that there must be other women who do also.

It's early, and I haven't had any coffee.. so I hope I made myself clear. :D:

[antsinmypants]

Amen Youze guyz!!!


To the one who asked about a dress code for his congregation:

Most everywhere I have been- has had one for the members. It wasn't by any means very strict. The only one I bucked on was in Spain, and they were asking me to wear skirts and dresses when I was caring for bed babies and toddlers. I only had hand-me-downs and all of those clothes were nice, and not long enough to be very modest with. (Not to mention I was 12 and 13 at the time..)
I kicked a fuss with the pastor and we met an agreement- sort of.. I could wear pants so long as the parents didn't see me in them (I.E. I was in the background).

We had a problem there with women coming in pants WAAAAAAAAAAAY too tight, low cut tops and shorts..

I'm sorry, if it arouses my fiance's attention too much, I DO NOT wear it. I've asked him about my change in dress, and he said very honestly that it was better than before, though he did like what I had-- he likes what I have now- better.

:wave

[chris_h]

Originally posted by Danimus
You are absolutely not the only man who feels that way.
Exactly. I'm a freshman a college now. All the freshman girl happen to be flaunting it.

I've joked in the Guys forum about how there's a 7:3 girl-guy ration on campus, and 4:1 in my dorm building, but I really don't wanna stumble. Please pray.

[Jael]

Originally posted by mama2kira
I have a question about this. I understand the need for modesty. I only wear dresses and skirts to church, shorts at home and when I work. ( I clean other people's houses) I live in jeans in the winter, not tight ones though. Nothing see through, or above the navel when I wear t-shirts. My question is this-what about when I go to the swimming pool at the YMCA with my little ones? I don't want to attract looks, and my bathing suit is modest, if you could call a bathing suit modest, but I don't want to have to wear shorts and a t to swim in the pool....any thoughts appreciated.

Eddie Bauer makes a really modest swimsuit that comes in two pieces...a tunic and biker-style shorts that come down to just above the knee. The tunic is long enough to cover all of your tummy and all of your bottom and the style is a little flared so it's not hugging anywhere. It has a velcro attachment to keep the tunic from floating up while you swim. It's also made in solid colors (black with a blue and yellow stripe up the side) so it's not flashy or flirty. And it's not so much material that you feel weighted down. Of course Eddie Bauer is a bit expensive, but I've never seen another suit like that anywhere else, so...

[architectlink]

along the lines of this thread, I see the pendulum swinging.

I came from a country club like church where everyone dressed to the nines. Then we went to a Calvary Chapel church where everyone was sloppy in jeans.

I say that out of respect for God, we should dress appropriately to give HIM glory. If we are cold and frail and want to be casual, that is ok, but we should be neat and tidy for God. I do not think that women (myself included) need to be in halter tops and Britney Spears getups!

If you notice, the focus on dress for women has moved from the face to the neck to the breasts to the belly button and now to the you know where. THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU ARE PUTTING ON....Where does it focus the eye! You don't have to be a rocket scientist to figure out what a Britney Spears outfit is selling!

Never mind if it is causing someone to stumble...IS IT RESPECTFUL TO GOD?

[antsinmypants]

AMEN!!!

Here's another way to think on this:

When people of the OT and NT came to worship, they came as best dressed as they could- to celebrate.

This wasn't just a somber get together. This was women and men singing and dancing (Davidic/folk dancing), readings from the written scriptures and preaching on it.. prayers- and everyone taking care of everyone else.

The older women taught the younger women.

The older men taught the younger men.

Brothers and sisters took care of each other so that mom and dad could get something out of worship...


what happened to change this in OUR congregations??

We need to get back to basics.

[chris_h]

I know we should dress inappropriately, to cause others to stumble, but...

Aside from that, what does it matter how we should dress? God sees us at our best and our worst, including in the showers. He doesn't care what clothes we wear to church, as long as we are not causing others to stumble.

[Hyssop]

Sounds like the Holy Spirit is convicting you.

I've shared some of this story before,
I used to dress, immodestly....... In hindsight, I think it was for attention, power, control... Of course I wouldn't have accepted it as such or admitted it. I was a Christian BTW; but, I was not walking with the Lord. I liked the looks, attention, from men, even special treatment from Christian leaders even, ect.
I'll spare you the details.
Basically, low cut tops- jeans, the loose hair/lipstick, perfume... (I feel like throwing up, this is the first time I've confessed admitted that to anyone besides God and DH) I was basically seducing, I also proffessed Christ while presenting myself in an unholy way to non believers. I also had the whole very subtle seductive attitude thing going along with the way of dress. Looking back, I call it the Jezebel influence now.

Dressing even a little sexy or beautiful/attractive in that way had a snowball effect, it became a game of seduction and self and was about PRIDE. It kept me from growing or having a relationship with my Lord. I think that satan loves to use us against ourselves and our brothers like that.

Praise God, I was convicted by the Holy Spirit. I still struggle with guilt at times for being so ungodly, causing others to stumble, being so deceived and almost ruining everything. WOMEN DO NOT TAKE THIS TOPIC SERIOUSLY ENOUGH. We are powerful in the sexual sense, we should not allow ourselves to be led into the temptation of pride to hold power over men this way. It is dangerous ground. It works against the Lord.

Testamony: Thankfully, in the last couple of years, I have been under major continuing renovations by the Holy Spirit. My Christian faith and personal joy is SO much greater than anything I've ever known before. Our marriage is ten times better, I even love my husband more. Godly order, modest dress and humility are things very pleasing to the Lord and add blessings to our marriage and relationship w/ God. It is really- really special to keep your body/beauty and feminine glory as a gift for your husband only!

The reason I share this is so that, girls/women who read this might realize the impact that even seemingly small compromise (like dressing immodestly) can have on your Christian walk (and others as well) Bible is quite clear about how a woman should dress/act and not doing so will have real consequences in your life and walk.

I say this in love.

Blessings, Hyssop

[Hyssop]

[i]
The men follow the same guidelines, even wearing shirts. I personally think that men who do not wear shirts can be sexy, so I assume that there must be other women who do also.

It's early, and I haven't had any coffee.. so I hope I made myself clear. :D: [/B]

Good point :thumb
Although I don't think that women are as visually motivated as men (in general)- men should be careful as well, ladies can have lustful thoughts too.

Didn't Jesus wear an undergarment?

[antsinmypants]

Originally posted by chris_h
..what does it matter how we should dress? God sees us at our best and our worst, including in the showers. He doesn't care what clothes we wear to church, as long as we are not causing others to stumble.

G-d has ALWAYS ALWAYS asked for our best... even in the OT.

You have to realise this- No matter what we do, it'll never be "up to par" when it comes to meeting The Most High, Our King and L-rd.

But, if we were only in tatters and rags, and were told He is coming to our house today-- we sure would pull our our best tatters and rags to wear when he was here.

It's all in the heart--- but what the heart has- the outside is sure to reflect.


Think about it in this practical way:

You have a VIP coming to work tomorrow morning.. it's the highest ranking person in your company (or hey, even the president of the USA)- what do you do when you dress tomorrow morning?

You dress the best that you can.

G-d said that we shouldn't respect one person over the other, but hold them in the same esteem (high priority).

G-d said we're to honor Him more than everything-- it's said THREE times in the Ten Commandments (Exodus twice and Deuteronomy) and Y'shua reiterated it in three seperate accounts in the Gospels.

G-d is always top priority in what we do and how we act and how we dress, and always should be shown as such :D:

[antsinmypants]

Originally posted by Hyssop
Didn't Jesus wear an undergarment?

LOL

dead on truth there Hyssop- and men should take that hint.

Sometimes there are undies, or lack there of (atleast of support) that get notice... and create MANY problems with us girls.

[chris_h]

Yeah, well, I agree with you mostly on that.

However, this kind of thing could lead to materialism, showing off ("my clothes are better than yours, so I love God more than you"), hypocrisy, Pharasaicalism, and we're back to square one.

Think about it. If the Christians in the first century, or in China today, got all dressed up, and went to a certain building at the exact same time, the authorities would be a little suspicious, wouldn't you say?

[ylf1999]

personally if you know something you wear could make someone stumble you should not wear it.

I find nothing wrong with shorts but that is my personal opinion and it should be bought to prayer.

as for the sports bra. I think that is too revealing. bras should be worn as undergarment and not as clothing the public can see

YBIC

[glorymj]

Originally posted by ylf1999
as for the sports bra. I think that is too revealing. bras should be worn as undergarment and not as clothing the public can see :nod I agree, that's why we wear t-shirts over them. :thumb :D:

[KrispyKritter]

Hey everybody... I dont have anything on under my clothes!! Woo-hoo!!

Sorry, didnt mean to make anyone lust... :laugh

[glorymj]

:rolleyes


:fish


:laugh

[Hyssop]

Krispy: Too much information dude :D:

[antsinmypants]

Originally posted by chris_h
Yeah, well, I agree with you mostly on that.

However, this kind of thing could lead to materialism, showing off ("my clothes are better than yours, so I love God more than you"), hypocrisy, Pharasaicalism, and we're back to square one.

Think about it. If the Christians in the first century, or in China today, got all dressed up, and went to a certain building at the exact same time, the authorities would be a little suspicious, wouldn't you say?

I said it would be a matter of reflection of the heart. (which implies no pride issue of "i'm better than you")


The believers did dress the best they could.. and it's no problem if the authorities get all suspicious.. but it was said of Y'shua that eventually we would all be hunted out- and we would be persecuted for our faith.
Paul and the other disciples mentioned persecution.

Voice of the Martyrs mails out and emails about persecutions- and helps out with the help of the rest of us..

Until Y'shua comes again, no matter what we do as believers- the closer we are to truly following G-d's commands, the more we will be hunted out.


Something to think about...


Even in the books by Brother Andrew and Voice of the Martyrs- the people attending the house churches and congregations come well dressed-- and at intervals so that the state police don't find them all at once.. and they usually don't have enough bibles so they share ONE or Two (at most three) among the whole group..

[John Tyson]

Grace and peace to you all.

I can't add much more to what has already be said, but this very well be one of those times where this old saying applies:

If you feel like you need to ask if you can do something...the answer is probably, "No."

God bless,
John

[John Tyson]

Double posted by mistake.

[Hyssop]

Originally posted by antsinmypants


Until Y'shua comes again, no matter what we do as believers- the closer we are to truly following G-d's commands, the more we will be hunted out.



Right on! And the closer we are following God's commands (out of love/respect for our Lord) the stronger we will be in our relationship and IMO more blessed as well.

I had a thought the other day, someone has a quote on a post or sig, maybe in a home school thread? anyway, by Confusios (sp?) regarding education, and it said something like- "if you only hear something you won't fully understand it, you
have to do it/see it done to fully learn or grasp it."

Anyway, it made me think about my relationship with God, and it struck me that to know Jesus, to understand the Gospel we should LIVE it. How better to explain to others than by living it.

We hear and then we do, in the action after hearing the truth - truth is fully exposed in complete dimensions- and the depth and meaning of living Christ (as Paul said) is revealed to us in fullness. Not legalism, in my mind it is desiring a closer walk with the Lord- for the purpose of knowing Him better. Letting the Holy Spirit do it's work in our life is not legalism. Like Ants said (I think) it is the spirit in which we do these things. The condition of our heart and motivation.

I don't think there is enough emphasis on following through in our faith, people are so afraid to sound judgemental or not PC.
Am I making any sense?

He said: "If you LOVE me, you will DO these things"
What things? Love yes. Love God, love our neighbor... also do what is pleasing to Him, live to please Him. How do we know what is pleasing to Him? The Bible lays it out perfectly. One of those things is being modest in dress.

Hyssop

[antsinmypants]

Yup Hyssop- thanks for clarifying.

It's just like the Sh'ma we recite from the Ten Commandments

"Sh'ma Yisrael, Ad-nai El-heynu, Ad-nai Echad.
Baruch Shem Kivod, Malchuto Le Olam, Vaed.
-Amen

Hear O Israel, The L-rd Our G-d is one L-rd.
Blessed be His Glorious Name, Forever and ever- Amen

And You shall love your neighbor as yourself-

On these two commandments pivot the entire law and the prophets"

Sh'ma in Hebrew means "hear, understand- know/do"

Much more "heavy" in Hebrew than English

[glorymj]

Originally posted by Hyssop
I had a thought the other day, someone has a quote on a post or sig, maybe in a home school thread? anyway, by Confusios (sp?) regarding education, and it said something like- "if you only hear something you won't fully understand it, you
have to do it/see it done to fully learn or grasp it."
Motto on my website. :D:

I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.
~Confucius

[Hyssop]

Glorymj: and see what a blessing it was? :D:
Thanks

[chris_h]

Originally posted by antsinmypants
I said it would be a matter of reflection of the heart. (which implies no pride issue of "i'm better than you")


The believers did dress the best they could.. and it's no problem if the authorities get all suspicious.. but it was said of Y'shua that eventually we would all be hunted out- and we would be persecuted for our faith.
Paul and the other disciples mentioned persecution.

Voice of the Martyrs mails out and emails about persecutions- and helps out with the help of the rest of us..

Until Y'shua comes again, no matter what we do as believers- the closer we are to truly following G-d's commands, the more we will be hunted out.


Something to think about...


Even in the books by Brother Andrew and Voice of the Martyrs- the people attending the house churches and congregations come well dressed-- and at intervals so that the state police don't find them all at once.. and they usually don't have enough bibles so they share ONE or Two (at most three) among the whole group..
Alright. Thank you for that information.

I don't think that I am suggesting going to church in a diry sweat suit, but would you turn a seeking single mother and her three children away if essentially that's all they had to wear?

[D'Light]

I also feel women (and men) need to be more discreet in their clothing.

Hyssop: :thumb I agree with you on standards of modesty.

Chris-h: :confused I don't feel, people dress modestly to make people think they are better than others. I am saying this in all sincereness, you may want to dig inside your heart to see why you 'may' think Christians dress modest for that reason.

I am 51, but I am trim, yet I dress pretty modestly,even when I was in high school. Of course the bikini has gone by the wayside years ago!

:pound

Our church is a small country church, with mostly ranch and farm families, so we do wear jeans and slacks and dresses. I feel more comfortable in casual dresses though.

In public I do not like to wear, tank tops, tops that cling tight around the chest or waist. Jeans or slacks that are tight around the bottom. My dresses are mid calf or ankle length, deffinately not above the bottom of the knee.

I feel some women still wear the clothing too tight, this
sometimes can show more than something short, but loose. :eek

Anytime a woman is wearing something too tight or short, etc..when you sit in church and have to keep adjusting your clothing or check to see how you look; you are taking your mind off the Lord and onto yourself. ( not to mention the attention it
is causing, men's focus to be distracted).

Bless all... and go to the Lord with these concerns, He will guide you.
-D

[antsinmypants]

Originally posted by chris_h
Alright. Thank you for that information.

I don't think that I am suggesting going to church in a diry sweat suit, but would you turn a seeking single mother and her three children away if essentially that's all they had to wear?

Like I said before:

G-d has ALWAYS ALWAYS asked for our best... even in the OT.

You have to realise this- No matter what we do, it'll never be "up to par" when it comes to meeting The Most High, Our King and L-rd.

But, if we were only in tatters and rags, and were told He is coming to our house today-- we sure would pull our our best tatters and rags to wear when he was here.

It's all in the heart--- but what the heart has- the outside is sure to reflect.

Turn none away, but once they're in the fold, do all you can to help out- like in the NT Times!

[Kriscabob]

ok well thank you all on your insight I am not convicted just curious I do wear clothes that show my form but not the actual article and I have some thing to add... In Afgahanistan and other contries like it, the women wear those horrible hoopy thingys to not show the men their bodies but, do you really thing the men in those areas see the women that they really dont see and think they want to do bad things with them?? No matter what we wear the men are going to want us that is what God wanted not the nasty gay/lesbeins that would take over if no one "wanted" the other sex and remember that if Jesus came at the exact moment that you and your husband/wife were being intimate would there be blankets thrown around as if your mother walked in???? My answer... NO I would just go to Jesus and worship/praise him naked. Same with every thing I do.

[Hyssop]

Originally posted by Kriscabob
My answer... NO I would just go to Jesus and worship/praise him naked. Same with every thing I do.


:pound Okay, so I took this out of context :laugh Funny though. Can you tell I've got post traumatic posting disorder?? :wacko

YSIC, Hyssop

[Kriscabob]

;):

[D'Light]

I don't think most of us, were talking about new or non regulars to our churches. As I'm sure, the same with others, I am talking about regulars, members and/or Christians dressing in an unmodest manner. I do not judge anyone coming into our church, we all welcome anyone with open arms. -D

[KrispyKritter]

No, of course we dont jump down the throats of unbelievers or newer Christians. I do believe it shouldnt be long before a newer believer is made aware of these things. Personally, I believe that an older or more mature Christian lady should be the one to address this situation with a woman, in a loving mentoring way. Paul did exhort the older women to teach the younger women. A woman might feel very uncomfortable with a male leader in the church coming to her to tell her she is causing men to lust... ya know?

[John Tyson]

Originally posted by KrispyKritter
No, of course we dont jump down the throats of unbelievers or newer Christians. I do believe it shouldnt be long before a newer believer is made aware of these things. Personally, I believe that an older or more mature Christian lady should be the one to address this situation with a woman, in a loving mentoring way. Paul did exhort the older women to teach the younger women. A woman might feel very uncomfortable with a male leader in the church coming to her to tell her she is causing men to lust... ya know?

Krispy, that was very good advice.

God bless,
John

[antsinmypants]

Krispy, that's what I was saying- you just.. well.. expounded :D:

[JesusCompatable]

Ok I just have to post here. First off I would like to say that I am well accociated with the ways of the pervert.

To any one who wants to say that it doesnt matter what they wear because men will want them any ways, Your right, the proublem is in HOW they want you. When you wear revealing or tight clothing, they may not want YOU (IE your personality and person) so much as Your body. As a pervert I can attest that clothing changes perseptions. I respect wemen that wear clothing responsibly. However reckless clothing habbits can make any woman an Object INSTANTLY. I am then not so much interested in who they are, but rather how I can get closer to see what I can. When Talking to a woman that I find eroticly dressed my maner may change from 'getting to know you' to 'getting to know how to get too you' IE how to manipulate or gain your trust to move on to the ultimate goal of sexual relations. When wemen dress imodestly, weather they like it or not, they are advertising one thing, their sexualy promesquity. Of course their are varieing degrees of this. Im being as tart as I can here to prevent you from getting into trouble with people like I used to be.

Also, think of This, the bible says that when a Man lusts in His mind he commits Adultery. In some sense I also think this results in unkown mental rape of wemen. Dress imodestly and you run the risk of being mentaly 'deflowered' by men of all kinds. Let me tell you, there are no limits in the imagination, and with someone who does not think there is a such a thing as 'holding your thoughts acountable' the skys the limit. Do you realy want this?

Read some of the other posts on what to wear and not to wear they are a good guide so far.

My other thought on this is this. God made wemen Beautifully, Praise God for all the curves and corners. I think that God made you that way for one reason "A man will leave his mother and father and Cleave to his WIFE" Your beauty is a GIFT of God to the man your going to marry. It is For Him and ONLY him. To do any less is to CHEAPEN the Gift God gave to you so freely. Think of it this way. If you had a gift to give, and you had 2 options, one, give it to One special person, or 2 give it to every one you see in small amounts. Giving it to every one you see in small amounts Cheapens the Gift, and for any one person it becomes a Mer TRINKET, rather than a great gift. The one person you give it to will have a greater Gift if he Knows you saved it ONLY for him.

Dont sell youself short, your Beauty is something great. Dont cheapen it by just giving it away to every one.

Also somethings to avoid from preditors (IE perverts who will try to get a 'peek' from you when your not aware)

Be aware of the situation your In, IE malls with glass elivators or walls. If your in realy loose shorts or a short skirt(sometimes even dresses) stay away from the areas were some one in a lower position can see were they shouldnt.

Always be aware of your knees. This may seem strange, but make sure that your keeping them together when you have skirts or shorts when there is nothing infront of you to block 'peeks'. You may even want to try to sit in places that aford you this protection.

Be aware of any one who seems to be walking to close to you, Some perverts have cameras in bags etc that can 'peek' up skirts and dresses. If you feel uncomfortable in any way, God may be telling you something.

This may seem shocking to some, but this is the real world. I would like to see wemen upheld as the Gift they are, not objects of lust. I have had much experience with my lust, and with God showing me a great many things through my struggles. I hate seeing the things I used to lust over, scantly clad wemen now saden me and hurt me because I am trying so very hard to change the way I think, and that realy doesnt help.

May God always Keep you, and One day help you to Give the great gift you have to the one whome it belongs.

[Hyssop]

JesusCompatible: Thank you for sharing that, you summed up perfectly how women (innocently enough even) could cause a brother to stumble or fall- because of their choice of dress...It is really sobering to think that those perverted things do happen (leering, cameras, seduction)
to women even when they are unaware. Dressy "sexy" hurts more than weaker brothers/men, it hurts the Lord and it hurts women.

Thanks for being so frank and caring and brave enough to share these thoughts. :thumb :):

Blessings, YSIC, Hyssop

[chris_h]

Originally posted by D'Light
Chris-h: :confused I don't feel, people dress modestly to make people think they are better than others. I am saying this in all sincereness, you may want to dig inside your heart to see why you 'may' think Christians dress modest for that reason.
Because, I honestly can't see a reason for why dressing up is important.

Ants, when you say, "G-d has ALWAYS ALWAYS asked for our best... even in the OT,", I do agree with you, ant we shouldn't necessarily be wearing something old and nasty, but I don't particularly think that He cares how fancy it is we dress, but is more concerned with our heart, and how we are aligned with respect to Him.

Maybe it's b/c I'm in college, poor, and can't afford a coat and tie and all, don't know how to iron or tie a tie, or that I had to wear coat and tie at high school somewhat frequently and hated it. ;): But actually, I think I believed this before any of that.

[D'Light]

Chris-h:

We were speaking of dressing modestly, not of dressing'up'.
I do not feel like we need to be all fancied up either, just properly and clean.

And yes, God does mention in the bible Can't re. where right now.
about womens attire, same as along the lines of nothing garish or alot of gold in the hair?

Chris, I myself do not feel that you need a tie and jacket, just be neat and clean and dressed modestly. IMO :nod

[antsinmypants]

Chris-

Let me tell you how frugal i am :laugh :pound..

If I pay $20 for a skirt or dress... it's a blue moon. I don't buy it if it's not on sale CHEAP. I don't buy it if it's not long and modest ( and I HUNT AND HUNT).

I go to the thrift store OFTEN and browse and browse, and every so often I come home with something.

Clothing? I don't buy much - but when I do-- it's deals like $5 skirts or shirts..

Earrings? Same thing- it's between $1 and $7 for the earrings and if it's $5-$7-- it's probably a blue moon if I get it.

I don't make much money at all $18,000 I get to keep after the government is through with me (State, County and USA).. and most of it goes to bills (insurance, phone, rent to my parents and paying back the loan for the car I just got and my car insurance).

Trust me- Lincoln screams.. I squeeze him enough!!

Spider and the others that were at the rally tonight can attest to what I wear and that I was very modestly dressed.
This ENTIRE ensamble cost me... 30$.

$13 dancing shoes (online discount store)
$5 Skirt
$9 shirt
$3 pantyhose


I had the long slip and the full slip before, so they don't count :P:

The shoes, I've had for about 4 months and take good care of so they last- believe me, they've almost outworn their worth LOL

You can hunt and bargain shop.. but it takes time..

and like everyone keeps saying- it's your HEART that makes your "bargain bin" clothes New, and spiffy. It's never a "look at me" - it's an "I am here, I am modest- let's get done what has to get done" -- and for worship it's "Ok everybody- it's time to pray, it's time to praise, it's time to worship and let's all get up here for some Davidic dance here in the HOUSE!!" :D:

Shabbat Shalom! :wave

[chris_h]

Wow! That is frugal.

Hey, but I'm a college student. Poor is my middle name.

[JesusCompatable]

antsinmyants sounds like my kinda woman (JK)

I hate speding alot on clothes, I try to keep it under 10$ for pants if I can help it. I dont buy from thrift stores, but there are some good outlet stores around town.



Hyssop
If I can get one person to change the way they think about their beauty and how to use it responsibly, I will be happy. I think Gods plan for men and wemen and the relations we have with each other are Perfect, and we would be all happier if we followed Gods advise :D:

[Kriscabob]

:wacko :jaw what?!?!?!? Why no how is it any womans resonsibility to be dressing in a manner that it would be impossible for a guy to see up our dresses or skirts with a cam or even an invisable mirror on their shoes??? If we notice then there are usually the usual concequences such as a well placed hard slap in the face phsically or verbal. But to say that it is our resonsibility is rediculous what happens if and or when a device is created or made avalible that can see through clothing??? What then?? what we should start to wear those lead tunics that are availible for x-rays?? I swshould think not we protect our selfs as much as possible. Also women get raped every day pretty/ugly, slim/fat, what ever and that isnt the womens fault. And there are also burglers so alot like the way you have put it the people that are missing their stuff shouldn't have had it or shown it to people. We put locks on every thing (our clothes are our locks) and it is still wrong to "take" the products no matter if one lock isnt as strong or as big. My "lock" maybe smaller or weaker but it is there and maybe as even God and Jesus would have done IMO is "chatize" or what ever the burgler not the victim!!!:nod

[glorymj]

No one said that women are responsible for rape. :tsk You can't jump to an extreme like that and say that it doesn't matter what you wear because "someone" is going to be offended/lustful. It does matter, and the bible is quite clear that it is the woman's responsibility to do what she can to keep from causing another to stumble.

[Kriscabob]

Yes and my point is sometimes there is nothing we can do period! And for someone to say anything along the lines of we have to some how stop the perverts tat are crawling up to our windows for a peep or the guys that have the cam bag or even the people with cam in the bathrooms some things are out of our hands and to even try is worthless maybe then we should never leave the room that has no windows??? I think not

[glorymj]

I didn't get that from his post at all. What I understood him to say is that if you dress and act modestly you remove much of the temptation. Keep yourself modest, and then you are blameless irregardless of what someone else may do.

Just because someone else sins does not give you a reason to. You are responsible for yourself, and the bible is clear that you are to dress and act modestly. It doesn't add "if you think it will do any good."

[JesusCompatable]

I wasnt saying that its your responsiblity, I was giving you a 'heads up' so that you may at least be able to be aware of situations that may get you victomized.

The simple fact of the matter is, some women make it too easy. I cant tell you how many times I have to make myself walk in the other direction because I know I have a tendancy to look were I shouldnt. Not every one is convicted of the holy spirit as I am, and will and do look for those oportunities.

Its true that there are somethings you have Lilttle control over, IE other people and their actions. But you can do alot with very little effort to make sure no one gets those oportunities. Im just saying that you can control one thing, yourself, and its just good insurance. I think Jesus would admonish you to do what you can without going out of your way, every person is responsible for themselves.

[Hyssop]

Originally posted by Kriscabob
: But to say that it is our resonsibility is rediculous what happens if and or when a device is created or made avalible that can see through clothing??? What then?? what we should start to wear those lead tunics that are availible for x-rays?? nod

:pound That was really good!

BUT I agree with GloryMJ & others-

If the "locks" you speak of are alluring, purposely to look valuable, to lure in the thieves- it really doesn't make sense. Why would someone do so? Why does one want to dress skimpy/tight? Self pride? Fashion? ..Comfort?

I don't think we are talking rape, we are talking possibly causing others to have thoughts that are lustful by wearing "locks" that say: "Treasures inside, looky looky, aren't my jewels beautiful, woo woo"

If you don't want to see it how we do, or accept what is said (with scripture) to support it, that is your choice. For instance, I don't think anyone here is out to be holier than thou-or trying to rain on anyones parade or oppress women, just trying to make people think more about how we dress. Some women (and men) need to be reminded of this, maybe you don't.

Love, Hyssop

[glorymj]

Originally posted by Hyssop
I don't think we are talking rape, we are talking possibly causing others to have thoughts that are lustful by wearing "locks" that say: "Treasures inside, looky looky, aren't my jewels beautiful, woo woo"
:spit :pound

[Jael]

Originally posted by Kriscabob
Yes and my point is sometimes there is nothing we can do period! And for someone to say anything along the lines of we have to some how stop the perverts tat are crawling up to our windows for a peep or the guys that have the cam bag or even the people with cam in the bathrooms some things are out of our hands and to even try is worthless maybe then we should never leave the room that has no windows??? I think not

Kriscabob, you are not responsible for what others do, but you are responsible for your own obedience...the word says:

1Ti 2:9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;

Saying that men will lust after women no matter what they wear is not a valid justification for immodest dress...yes, we do have a responsibility as women - it is to dress and conduct ourselves in a way that is pleasing to God. Having done so, we cannot control the actions and attitudes of others, and God does not expect us to. But we need to be sure our clothing choices are not part of the problem. ;):

[Kriscabob]

ok ok maybe I was a bit pissy! But, as a rape victim that has been told (or thought) that it was some how my fault, the post by Jesus Compatable in particular struck a familiar chord. As such I apologize to upset anyone. So now what exactly is ...

1Ti 2:9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;

or at least everyones oppinion??? As I said before I do not personaly feel convicted yet I am a very curious person

[JesusCompatable]

1Ti 2:9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;

Woman adorn themselves in modest apparel
Modestly, to cover ones self with the intention of dressing sensably, not to atract the wrong kind of attention (IE lustfull stares)

with shamefacedness and sobriety
shamefacedness may mean like sternfaced, basicaly with resolve, and sobriety is clearheadedness. (Im just asuming this, I dont studdy the greek or anything)

not with broided hair
this may be braided hair, back then that was proubly more of a statement than it is now. Braiding your hair may have had something to do with a statement about your intentions, IE your looking for attention, so you get all 'gussied up.

or gold, or pearls, or costly array
Nowadays jewlry doesnt have the same meaning as it did back then, it was considered adornment, If one could afford this stuff and wore it in public it was again a message about ones intentions. I want attention.

----------------------------

My view of this is basicaly, Wear modest clothing, Thinking soberly about your apearance, and avoiding things that may send the wrong message to other people.

[antsinmypants]

Originally posted by Kriscabob
1Ti 2:9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;


In Like Manner:

G5615
ho-sow'-toce
From G5613 and an adverb from G846; as thus, that is, in the same way: - even so, likewise, after the same (in like) manner.


Also:
G2532
kahee
Apparently a primary particle, having a copulative and sometimes also a cumulative force; and, also, even, so, then, too, etc.; often used in connection (or composition) with other particles or small words: - and, also, both, but, even, for, if, indeed, likewise, moreover, or, so, that, then, therefore, when, yea, yet.

That Women:

G1135
gunē
goo-nay'
Probably from the base of G1096; a woman; specifically a wife: - wife, woman.


Adorn:

G2885
kos-meh'-o
From G2889; to put in proper order, that is, decorate (literally or figuratively); specifically to snuff (a wick): - adorn, garnish, trim.


themselves:

G1438
heh-ow-too'
(Including all the other cases); from a reflexive pronoun otherwise obsolete and the genitive (dative or accusative) of G846; him (her, it, them, also [in conjunction with the personal pronoun of the other persons] my, thy, our, your) -self (-selves), etc.: - alone, her (own, -self), (he) himself, his (own), itself, one (to) another, our (thine) own (-selves), + that she had, their (own, own selves), (of) them (-selves), they, thyself, you, your (own, own conceits, own selves, -selves).


In Modest:

G2887
kos'-mee-os
From G2889 (in its primary sense); orderly, that is, decorous: - of good behaviour, modest.

G2889
kos'-mos
Probably from the base of G2865; orderly arrangement, that is, decoration; by implication the world (in a wide or narrow sense, including its inhabitants, literally or figuratively [morally]): - adorning, world.


G265
ham-ar'-tay-mah
From G264; a sin (properly concrete): - sin.


with:

G3326
meta
met-ah'
A primary preposition (often used adverbially); properly denoting accompaniment; “amid” (local or causal); modified variously according to the case (genitive case association, or accusative case succession) with which it is joined; occupying an intermediate position between G575 or G1537 and G1519 or G4314; less intimate than G1722, and less close than G4862): - after (-ward),X that he again, against, among, X and, + follow, hence, hereafter, in, of, (up-) on, + our, X and setting, since, (un-) to, + together, when, with (+ -out). Often used in composition, in substantially the same relations of participation or proximity, and transfer or sequence.


Shamefacedness:

G127
ahee-doce'
Perhaps from G1 (as a negative particle) and G1492 (through the idea of downcast eyes); bashfulness, that is, (towards men), modesty or (towards God) awe: - reverence, shamefacedness.


and sobriety:

G4997
so-fros-oo'-nay
From G4998; soundness of mind, that is, (literally) sanity or (figuratively) self control: - soberness, sobriety.


Not with Braided hair:

G4117
pleg'-mah
From G4120; a plait (of hair): - broidered hair.

G4120
plek'-o
A primary word; to twine or braid: - plait.


Or Gold:

G5557
khroo-sos'
Perhaps from the base of G5530 (through the idea of the utility of the metal); gold; by extension a golden article, as an ornament or coin: - gold.

G5530
chraomai
Middle voice of a primary verb (perhaps rather from G5495, to handle); to furnish what is needed; (give an oracle, “graze” [touch slightly], light upon, etc.), that is, (by implication) to employ or (by extension) to act towards one in a given manner: - entreat, use. Compare G5531, G5534.



Or Pearls:

G3135
margaritēs
From margaros
(a pearl oyster); a pearl: - pearl.


Or Costly:

G4185
polutelēs
From G4183 and G5056; extremely expensive: - costly, very precious, of great price.


Array:

G2441
himatismos
From G2439; clothing: - apparel (X -led), array, raiment, vesture.






Does that help ? :laugh :wave

[ibelieveinHIM]

after glancing through the first page of responses to this thread, i had to skip the rest because it just cracked me up. all this fuss about what women wear and how we are distracting the men.....let me tell you, some of the men i see dress 10 times worse than the women! and what about mowing the grass and playing basketball with no shirt on??? tell me that's not a distraction! whew!:yell

[antsinmypants]

Originally posted by ibelieveinHIM
all this fuss about what women wear and how we are distracting the men.....let me tell you, some of the men i see dress 10 times worse than the women! and what about mowing the grass and playing basketball with no shirt on??? tell me that's not a distraction! whew!:yell

Good on ya!


You're right.. Men have to dress modestly too-- and I have noticed this-- but it seems that the women have more of a problem with it.. and Hyssop :spit :pound I LOVE that analogy, I couldn't have said it that well, but I sure was thinking it !!!!!

It's a two part/two-fold effort..

Women- Dress modestly,, know your bible and LIVE IT (show me your works by your faith, and I will show you my faith by my works..), and breathe it.. and things will make a turn around (believe me, I know- as I said to atleast 3 people today alone)..

Men- do the same!! Golly, it's AWFUL to see a man out there in less clothes than he'd wear for his wife inside the doors of his house! :eek

Just as a woman's comely shape should be seen and admired and lusted after - only by her husband.. the SAME is in effect for the man..

:B:
SELAH (THINK ABOUT IT)

:wave

[Leah4Jesus]

Can I just ask a question? I've only been born again for just under a year. Before I was saved and before I had my last daughter (who's almost 2) I used to dress very provocatively - halter necks, midriffs, tight pants, short skirts - because I loved the attention (and my husband loved having me to "show off"). A few months after being born again a visiting pastor preached at church and he talked about the clothes we wear. I felt convicted after that to change my outfits (I wasn't dressing sexy like I used to, but wearing the low-slung jeans that were in fashion). The problem is though is that my husband hasn't followed me in becoming born again. He would still love me to dress sexy and is always making comments about me not dressing sexily anymore (he thinks I'm a fuddy duddy now!).

I want to dress even more modestly than I do now, especially after reading threads like this. The problem is my husband. Do I go against his wishes and dress the way I feel the Lord is wanting me to? Or do I "obey" my husband and dress sexy? I just feel I am being held back by DH in some aspects of Christian life I'd likd to observe.

I'd appreciate any thoughts anyone might have.

[spadart]

Originally posted by Leah4Jesus
Can I just ask a question? I've only been born again for just under a year. Before I was saved and before I had my last daughter (who's almost 2) I used to dress very provocatively - halter necks, midriffs, tight pants, short skirts - because I loved the attention (and my husband loved having me to "show off"). A few months after being born again a visiting pastor preached at church and he talked about the clothes we wear. I felt convicted after that to change my outfits (I wasn't dressing sexy like I used to, but wearing the low-slung jeans that were in fashion). The problem is though is that my husband hasn't followed me in becoming born again. He would still love me to dress sexy and is always making comments about me not dressing sexily anymore (he thinks I'm a fuddy duddy now!).

I want to dress even more modestly than I do now, especially after reading threads like this. The problem is my husband. Do I go against his wishes and dress the way I feel the Lord is wanting me to? Or do I "obey" my husband and dress sexy? I just feel I am being held back by DH in some aspects of Christian life I'd likd to observe.

I'd appreciate any thoughts anyone might have.

My thoughts would be to dress sexy for him not for him to show you off. Instead of wearing low cut halter tops that let the world see what you've got, buy a lacy bra and panty set or a langerie outfit that only your husband will see and let him know that this is all for him and no one else.

Also explain to your husband what you are feeling. That you are feeling convicted to dress modestly and why you think you need to do so. I am not saying he will understand prompting of the Holy Spirit but at least you have given him a reason and he may not see you as a fuddy duddy. He may even wonder about this change in you and seek God out!

On another note, being unequally yoked in a marriage is a hard thing. My mother is saved but my father is not and sometimes he just doesn't understand why my mother is doing some of the things she is doing. Don't get frustrated with your husband if he doesn't understand the changes in you, just follow God's leading. I will pray for you.

YSIC<><

[Leah4Jesus]

So basically what I should do is dress modestly in public, and keep any form of sexy dressing for the bedroom. My opinion is that following my Lord is more important than my husband's "whims and fancies".

Yesterday we had a "talk" and he is not liking the changed person I am, he said I don't laugh anymore, I used to have a drink with him etc. My answer to that is that I don't laugh at crude things anymore, I don't like to watch most movies because they sicken me, and I don't drink to get drunk anymore. I know I am changed and I can't help that... the Holy Spirit has made these changes in me and I'm not going to worry if I come across as a drag to people.

Being unequally yoked is a hard thing to deal with. Thank goodness I have my Father to help me through it.

[Bondservant]

I do not think one should wear anything that "draws" attention to themselves in a sexual way. Men are stumbled in this area.

[Bondservant]

Originally posted by Leah4Jesus
Yesterday we had a "talk" and he is not liking the changed person I am, he said I don't laugh anymore, I used to have a drink with him etc. My answer to that is that I don't laugh at crude things anymore, I don't like to watch most movies because they sicken me, and I don't drink to get drunk anymore. I know I am changed and I can't help that... the Holy Spirit has made these changes in me and I'm not going to worry if I come across as a drag to people.
Being unequally yoked is a hard thing to deal with. Thank goodness I have my Father to help me through it.


1 Peter 4
3For you have spent enough time in the past doing what pagans choose to do--living in debauchery, lust, drunkenness, orgies, carousing and detestable idolatry. 4They think it strange that you do not plunge with them into the same flood of dissipation, and they heap abuse on you.

[antsinmypants]

amen bondservant!

[D'Light]

Leah4Jesus

I agree with Spadart....on the special attire for husband only!
You may want to consider, when you and your husband go out together, for ex. dinner, wear a little sexy number under your clothing. Let him know( brief peek) before you go out. He will enjoy this more than showing you off!

But you can keep modest with the public without being drab.

Bless you both. -D

[antsinmypants]

Originally posted by D'Light
But you can keep modest with the public without being drab.

Preach it !! :D: :laugh :nod

[pilgrimgal]

Pilgrimgal is getting a little nervous looking through 3 pages of "rules" on how to dress modestly. I have a complicated enough life- I have to keep this part as simple as possible:): I use common sense, cover what my mother taught me should be covered, and so far I've not had any problem with men leering after me with lust. But I must say that the thought that anyone would look at this 48 year old's legs or anything else in a lustful way- well it gave me a good chuckle and I need that right now.

[antsinmypants]

Leslie, i've caught guys peeping at my mom and my aunt's legs - and they're over 40. (not much but still).

Funny as it may sound, it is a problem.

It's not just covering, but adaquately covering- and keeping it loose

[glorymj]

I've caught guys staring at my mom - and she's over 50. (ssshhh.. don't tell her I told you.. :laugh )

[antsinmypants]

:pound

sorry :D: ;):