you ever in a situation where you don't feel "accepted"?

[RJs here]

{mods..... not sure if this is the right forum! :doh ~ as I could see it fitting in several....}



Anyway.... on with the question ~ do you ever find yourself in a situation where you feel "not totally accepted" ??


Not just "out and out rejected" EITHER......


but just NOT *TOTALLY* accepted!!!


Whether among Christians or non {I can UNDERSTAND feeling this way among the non-Christians! But some how it always amazes me when I feel this way when surrounded by Christians....}



It's like..... I start questioning myself.... am I putting out some kind of vibe or something?

Do I have a screen up of some sort ~ that says, "do not include me in your group here?"

Guess it's EASIER to feel this way when I sense others are getting along & carrying on a conversation just fine ~ and some how, I feel like an "outsider".


:confused :wacko


Anyone else ever feel this way??

[yankeedownsouth]

:nod Yes, I do. Can't think of an example right now, but you're not alone. It's even more painful when you're with a group of Christians and you feel unaccepted.

[Enlightened]

Yes:nod :nod :nod

[icebear]

yes, i've always been considered *weird*... my brain just dosen't work the way everyone else's does for whatever reason...

:wacko :D:

i've gotten used to it. :):

[Jael]

I live there RJ, I actually own that piece of territory you're describing! :): Often people seem not to know quite what to make of me...As I have gotten older, I have sort of made peace with it - I try to be nice to everyone, but I don't worry too much about whether I am really accepted or not. Every now and then I meet someone with whom I have an instant rapport, but often I draw kind of a puzzled reaction from people :confused. And I just smile and go on. As long as I am not making enemies, I'm content.

[RJs here]

that "instant rapport" *IS* nice, Jael ~ the few times it DOES happen!!


I had that happen fairly recently at a Christian concert ~ and it was like *boom* ~ we were meant to be friends! ~ and we've stayed in touch on email ever since.



I *KNEW* those ladies were a GIFT from the Lord!! :thumb

[Jael]

Originally posted by RJs here
that "instant rapport" *IS* nice, Jael ~ the few times it DOES happen!!


I had that happen fairly recently at a Christian concert ~ and it was like *boom* ~ we were meant to be friends! ~ and we've stayed in touch on email ever since.



I *KNEW* those ladies were a GIFT from the Lord!! :thumb

Yes, that's how I think of it too...those rare people are a gift from God to me. :): :nod

[SadieGrace]

RJ,

You know what? I bet your zeal & love for the Lord are just too much for them

Sometimes it seems that people that are longing for the return of the Lord are not too welcome in the "Christian community" anymore. It brings a fear of 'why don't I want Him to come back?'

Just a theory, but I have noticed the same happening, esp. if they know that you actually read the scripture & know it well.

I'm starving to talk about the word with other believers & when I have with people from the "church" I get such strange looks and responses - kindof like, hey we're not in church right now, do we have to talk about all this now? or - hmmm...guess I've never read that before, but by the way, can you help out at my tupperware party next Fri.....

I'm not so sure that very many in the organized churches are actually truly born again? Hope I'm wrong, but I fear that the tares outweigh the wheat at this time, at least in the churches I've been in.:(:



Sadie

[annie10]

All the time RJ,

I always feel like I don't belong.

You know it's easier when I'm around non-christians, but when it's other christians doing it, It's just so sad. :(:

But like others have posted, I try not to let it get to me. :):

After all we are not of this world!!! :D:

[paw]

[QUOTE]Originally posted by RJs here
{mods..... not sure if this is the right forum! :doh ~ as I could see it fitting in several....}



Anyway.... on with the question ~ do you ever find yourself in a situation where you feel "not totally accepted" ??


[b]Not just "out and out rejected" EITHER......


[u]but just NOT *TOTALLY* accepted!!![/u

RJ,
I guess we all feel as you do from time to time, but it's important to realize that our self-worth and identity is not based on what people think of us. What matters is how God views us.
Last year dusty started a tread focusing on "identity" or who we are in Christ. The scripture list was quite long describing how precious we are to God. He accepts us totally and without condition. People will fail us in our expectations of them, but the Lord is faithful always.

Pat

[RJs here]

*whew* ~ yes, thank goodness for God's UNCONDITIONAL love!! I can EASILY accept that {with a LOT of gratitude!!}


Just still wondering.... why it just feels.... well!

*plum AWKWARD*

in *some* Christian circles!!


:wacko



like ~ well, like you don't feel *close* to them AT ALL!!

And ~ like they really are not extending that invitation to YOU (to feel close) to them ANYWAY!!


**bizarro!**

:twitch

[blessedone]

Can I join your club? I've been at my church for over a year now, my husband is totally accepted (he's very personable) and I just get odd looks. :confused

I'm the quiet type but I've learned some lessons from my dh on how to communicate with others. I thought I was actually getting good at it , but when I tried to open up to one woman she actually just came out and told me that she doesn't know how to take me, I said "well, you just take me as I am." She didn't talk to me again for months. I think it's that I can't do the "small talk", it's always issues and the bible with me.

Anyways, it doesn't bother me a bit now, did when I was younger. Now I find it kind of amusing, because I know that Jesus takes me just as I am!:nod

[Wileyzmuse]

RJ I've lived most of my life this way!!

A good friend recently made me realize that i 'expect a lot' of friendships and social situations (thanks JustGodsChild), so part of it may be perception. If we are people-people, I think we are more disappointed when others don't warm up to us right away.

On the other hand, I think the evil one works hard to separate believers from each other, so the vibes may be real in that sense.

I believe also that wherever in our lives we allow God to shine through us best, is where we will experience the strongest rejections and trials.

YSIC,
Patricia

[cameron222]

As long as God loves me it really doesn't matter what man thinks.

But a psychologist once said that the deepest craving in man is to be appreciated.

But remember that Jesus said that the world would hate us becuse it hated Him.

Count it all joy......

[Bob Billings]

That is the way it is with me right now Bob Billings

[motherbeth]

I can totally relate. I don't fit in the "crowd" at our church either. Nice people, but I don't think I really belong there. We just keep praying for a new church family.

[GraceX3]

Count me in too. :nod

This has always helped me. I look for another person who doesn't appear to be fitting in either. Sometimes I don't find them but it can be joyous when I do. :):

Maybe it's because churches can be more of social clubs than places to gather with all Christians. Unfortunately.

This does seem lopsided, because I often find it easier to make friends with non-Christians. Sometimes I wonder if that's how God intended my life to be.

YSIC,

Melanie

[Doobie56]

I have felt this way ever since I can remember...has always been this way for me...

I don't expect it to change in my lifetime either...

I always said if I made it to Heaven, I would be happy to "sweep the streets of Gold." I suspect even in Heaven I will be on the outside looking in...but that part will be okay then, as I will be in Heaven and with our Lord.

It's a lonely place I'm sure, for many. Funny how we can feel this way for ourselves and reading this thread, we can realize how many others feel just the same way.

But I doubt things will change for me. It's a way of life for me. And I have learned to accept this with age. I guess there are just some things in life such as social acceptance that I will just not ever truely understand.

But in my heart I know that I am unique to God, special and very individual. I just Pray one day I can come to understand HIS will in my life and obey this Will and plan HE has for me. Somehow, I know that all these "outside looking in" feelings will be of a greater purpose in His Plans. Just find myself often praying for a better understanding of why I can't fit in with the rest of the crowds. Maybe that is why crowds make me very uncomfortable eh? Life goes on...I live it and I will one day see the "Son" shining upon me. :nod :angel

[Rach]

Boy I'm surprised so many feel this way. I've always felt this way. Never been able to figure it out completely.

Are people afraid to let others in their life? Man i'd welcome everyone, it makes things more interesting. I use to have more non-christian friends than I do now, our worlds just get further apart. A few have become christians tho.

Churches are kinda hard. :confused never understood that.

Family can really be the toughest.

The RR board is great. I think we learn to listen to each other and how to respond. We have time to think before we "speak". Maybe we are more relaxed than when we're with people.

Would love to be able to meet everyone, I think we have formed a unique bond.

[Mongoose60]

I think that this has happened to a good size number of us.

[Mommy2KandM]

YES! My son just started first grade at a christian private school. (at my church) Hubby came up with a name for some of the moms.. they suffer from PMS. " Popular Mom Syndrome. "

Sometimes I am amazed that it doesn't matter how old you get or if you are among christians or not. People still act like they are in High School. It is WAY to much work to act like them... So I will just hang with the regular moms or by myself if there are none:laugh ! :rolleyes

[ILJ]

:doh And here I thought I was the only oddball. :laugh Well, we all fit in together, don't we??? We can be our own little "in" crowd!!! Glad to meet each & every one of you!